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INDIAN MEN in UAE is a scammer too---BEWARE!!!!Reader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by Sree Divya (United States), Sep 12, 2014 at 02:11 i have so much to say on the issue, but i would like to make it known here, that even though this particular forum is primarily for Middle Eastern men who are Muslim, let me tell you, there are a great many INDIAN men who are doing the SAME exact thing to Western women!! unfortunately, i am one such example. i had my heart broken several times, by the same guy, over the course of a YEAR, until everything culminated in disaster when his sister found out and he flew the coop, claiming not to know me... she then proceeded with threats to leave him alone & i of course was insulted, not to mention devastated... why did i stay with him for so long? because i was in love with him and he said he was in love with me. (of course he said a lot more than that, but i want to get to the point..) i gave him so many chances despite the fact that he made me upset innumerable times, simply by his ignoring me & overall carelessness... His sporadic behavior / inconsistency, availability only at very specific times & WANTING TO KEEP ME A SECRET from his friends & family were big red flags. not to mention, i caught him liking several girls pics on facebook, and this made me upset. He called me his wife, and all these sweet names in Hindi and was very endearing. Yet he somehow felt the need to like all his pretty classmates pics. (He's in college btw)...... and they were all Indian too.. i was the only white female in his friends list, which he kept private for the longest time, until i pressured him to show me. anyway, i told him that it really upset me everytime it showed up in my newsfeed that he liked a girl's pic, and he said "dear she is just a friend /sister/ cousin/ classmate....what's the big deal"....or "i only love u dear, u are beautiful for me"....or, probably the worst and stupidest of all: "their beauty is only secondary dear, yours is most important " --haha, WHAT ??? justifying flirtatious behavior with other women.... absolutely mindblowing that he could be so thoughtless and rude. he never stopped with the behavior even though i told him it upset me. so: not respecting my feelings: check 1. Check 2: he proposed marriage to me within the first week of becoming friends on facebook & kept pressing me to come in Skype, even though i was very hesistant. i eventually caved in 2 weeks later, but that's another story.... so yea, that's a lot of red flags right there. i'm caught in between wanting to tell my full story (as details can be helpful) and wanting to paint a brief, more concise picture for the rest of the women here in case any are involved with Indian men, or even mine in particular, as i'm sure he has other prospects (beware!).... i'm very attracted to Indian men, so i fall hard for their handsome looks and charm (and they can really ramp up the charm and be endearingly deferential and respectful, which is hard to come by in the US)....i keep looking to find a nice Indian man, despite my better judgment. i blame myself, but i feel, the heart wants what the heart wants.... anyway, to get up to speed, a few important details about this man who deceived me and others like him: His name is Dinesh (i'll reveal his full name in later replies if anyone is interested, to prevent them from potentially being scammed by him as well.) He is Malayalee, originally from the state of Kerala, India. His native language is Malayalam, though he also speaks Hindi, Marathi and English. *He is Hindu, not Muslim* He is currently living in Mumbai (Navi Mumbai) at a boy's hostel while he attends college there, but his parents rent an appartment just outside of that area in Kalyan, in the state of Maharashtra. His sister is currently living in Dubai, UAE (so there is some relevance here to the Middle East..) for a better life and to make more money, as per my understanding, Dubai is a fairly wealthy country, and certainly has a better economy than India. His "cousin brother" as he refers to him is *also* living in Dubai, where he works as a petroleum engineer. Petroleum engineers have one of the most lucrative salaries among all engineering careers. He has traveled extensively for work back and forth between Dubai, Saudi Arabia and Kuwait. I wonder about his ties and perhaps allegiance to the Middle East because of his involvement there. ***MANY Indians, especially South Indians (usually Malayalam and Tamil) RELOCATE to the UAE as it is their chance at a better life, probably easier to get a visa into, and logistically speaking, MUCH closer to India (one need only cross the Arabian sea....as opposed to going halfway around the world to a wealthy Western country like the United States...) that said, LADIES: if an Indian man from India OR the UAE or anywhere in the Middle East is romancing you ONLINE and they make PROMISES of coming to be with you in Europe, Australia or America, don't count on it. they are probably already married, cheating on their wives and just looking for cyber sex and/or MONEY. though they may be desperate to escape the impoverished areas of their Native Country, they can settle much more assuredly in places like Dubai, Fiji or Mauritius, where they already have diasporic communities set up there in much larger numbers (this is my experience based on many observations**) **NB- Indians & other South Asians do have diasporic communities set up in places like Canada, the UK and the US, but it is much harder to gain entry into these countries. which brings me to another point: if anyone tells you they are single, lonely or all alone (meaning no family), that is most likely a LIE and a ploy for sympathy. Indian men marry fairly young and almost always within their Indian communities / culture / region via arranged marriage. If an Indian man from the UAE or any other nearby Middle Eastern country (Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, Oman) tells you they are single or all alone, caveat emptor: they have Indian communities already set up there & waiting to receive them. Culturally it is taboo to be with a Western woman so again.....they may make promises to you, beg you, reassure you that they love you and will come to marry you... when really all they want is internet sex & money. a good deal of them may be poor, but not impoverished like they say. they will pretend their situation is much worse than it really is so they can procure more cash from you, their victim. i would just like to make it known that i never gave my guy a penny (because i am not a walking bank account & MOST importantly, i refuse to buy love)....even though he hinted at his poverty, claiming it was his "biggest secret" and that he was struggling to get through school. he never once directly asked me for money until a YEAR later, sometime last month, when he really claimed to be struggling with debts for school. He asked for Rs 5000, which is roughly equivalent to $80 USD. i pretended to want to help, and led him on, to see how far he'd go in asking me, and believe me when i say he turned on the water works.. he said he had to beg from friends but they couldn't afford to help him. yeah, right.... when i refused repeatedly, he then asked if i could borrow money from my parents!! i feel like i haven't even touched the surface on what i want to say about this boy, but one thing i hope women take away from this, is that you may not always be approached by an Indian man living in India, but one from the Middle East, namely Dubai. Please take into account everything i mentioned about Indians living there. Regarding how this all relates back to the boy i was with, Dinesh....even though he is currently in India and made claims of coming to the US to marry me, a) he has close family members living in UAE and he will most likely settle there and b) he kept me secret for a reason, as i found out later when i decided to confront the situation directly. i kindly approached his sister thru facebook, and not only was she rude with me from the start, she later threw a fit & claimed i was a liar, even though i had photographs and screencaps of conversations as evidence to show her that we were in fact, involved. she refused to believe it and treated me like dirt. Can you imagine what the rest of his family would say....... Ladies, if your man---Indian or otherwise---is keeping you secret from his family, there's a very good reason for that. Don't tolerate it. i suspected the aforementioned scenario might be the case, but i had to see for myself, and as it turns out i was right. Dinesh has since fled, cut off contact with me, and told me i spoiled his life. But it's totally okay that he played with my heart, hid me from his family, led me on for a over year under false pretenses, and had the gall to add insult to injury by asking for money?? and on top of that, denies ever having known me after all that we've been through? There's love for you. PS- apologies for all the caplocks, i am not shouting or trying to be disrespectful, just feeling very passionate about the issue and also trying to emphasize certain points. Submitting....
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