Our enemies meet on an education policy...

Submitted by Dave (United States), Mar 22, 2021 at 20:45

The following is taken from a smuggled recording at a meeting of Russian, Turkish, Iranian, Chinese and North Korean secret agents in upstate New York:

"Okay, gentlemen, as you all know, we need ideas for wiping out America's lead in fields related to intellectual achievement. Currently, only about 18% of Americans graduate with STEM degrees, pretty low, so that's a good start. We need suggestions to make sure it stays low and that the rest of the population are as ignorant and pliable as possible."

"Well, one possibility is to make higher education as expensive as possible. Make sure that the good colleges are well out of reach of most of the population."

"Excellent, and we'll want to make them extremely restrictive, giving them an air of exclusivity, while the subjects that they teach are really just airy drivel or feel-good fluff."

"Exactly, like that Yale course on "Well Being". Make 'em pay up to watch Dr. Phil, I say. Combine the snob appeal of the Ivy League with an easy A, let everybody tune in, and we might be able to siphon off some potential engineering majors. Better gender studies than nuclear physics, right?" (wild laughter)

"And let's not forget to make sure the faculty are as sympathetic to us as possible. We want to preserve the college campus as a highly elite, conformist social organization with Marxist and pacifist sympathies that constantly condemns America for being evil and racist. That should help reduce her defense capability."

"Oh, sure, and let's place our agents strategically so that any college speaker who's anti-Islamist or has pro-American sympathies will be booed off the stage or cause a riot." (huzzahs all around)

"Right, and we can also get our friends from places like Qatar, Turkey and China to sponsor scholarships and prestigious programs. It's really easy to buy those anti-capitalist professors!"

"How true. And one last thing. Let's make sure our friends in organizations like CAIR or the SPLC condemn dangerous intellectuals like Daniel Pipes as subversives and racists. Black listing can be very effective."

"Great meeting, friends, let's go to it" (applause)

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