Razzin' Reuters

Submitted by Denis Ahearn (United States), Aug 23, 2010 at 07:29

Let's parse this bit of Reuters news ... if they can fun with words ... so can we ... Muslim Center Dispute Sparks New York Rallies By Edith Honan and Chris Michaud Edith Honan And Chris Michaud – Sun Aug 22, 1:53 pm ET NEW YORK (Reuters) –

Supporters and opponents of a proposed Muslim cultural center and mosque near the World Trade Center (disaster) site staged competing rallies (Wait a minute ... one side had thousands of folks .. from all walks of life. The other had a few liberal teachers and some recycled Black Panthers in their grandma's drapes ... but they sure looked cool.) in downtown Manhattan on Sunday, kept apart by police and barricades (Did you see any strugglin' goin' on? I didn't.). The emotionally charged debate, which has gained national political significance, centers on plans to build the center (mosque) two blocks from the site of the September 11, 2001 attacks by al Qaeda, which killed nearly 3,000 people. Republicans against the project are using it to attack Democratic President Barack Obama ahead of midterm elections, where his party is fighting to retain control of Congress. (Really! I didn't see ONE sign that mentioned the upcoming election at all ... but assigning ulterior motives is always good liberal politics, right?) Opponents of the center (mosque), which would include a prayer room (What! No bathrooms? No cloak rooms? No storage rooms? Where are the rugs stored? Hmmm!), say its proposed location is insensitive and fear it will harbor religious extremism (You mean extreme terrorists, right? Guess we've got nothon' to fear here!). Those who back it cite the right to religious freedom and a need to promote tolerance and understanding (Sing ..."Kumbaya"). Hundreds of opponents on Sunday chanted ( YELLED ... because they're angry, understand?) "No Mosque, (NOT "center")" sang patriotic songs (as opposed to heavy metal tunes ... or folks songs? No Peter, Paul and Mary? A shame!) and waved photographs of violent attacks by Islamic extremists (Truth! I can hardly believe my eyes!). One sign read: "Not all Muslims are terrorists, but all the terrorists were Muslim." Around the corner, supporters chanted: "We don't care what bigots ( psst ... that's all you folks with common sense ... that's you're tag for the day, okay?) say, religious freedom (and terrorists, too) is here to stay." ("Screw you! We're here to stay and to make you all realize we've got you by the chimes.) A supporter, retired school teacher (of course! any truck drivers there? any carpenters? construction guys? cops? firemen? EMT folks? Guess they're doing the football thing, right?) Ilene Kahn, said: "This has become a political tool (Tool? Hey, you hold that in your hand ... this is not a "tool" ... this is a demonstration that screams out "Don't fall for this garbage.") to preach hatred. The peace-loving Muslims did not attack us." While tempers were heated and shouting matches erupted, no violence or arrests were reported (You mean those nasty anti-mosque folks behaved themselves?). Uniformed police and rows of barricades kept many in the crowds apart. Police officials said extra forces were deployed but would not say how many were added. Obama and New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg have said they support the right of Muslims to build the center (mosque) near Ground Zero, while Republicans, including former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin (She wasn't there ... hasn't a thing to do with her ... why not ask a cop? Or a fireman? Nice try with the distraction mention.), oppose it. Others suggest it be moved to a less controversial spot. Ali Akram, a local doctor who supports the project, said: "The people who say the mosque (he meant "center" … sorry!) is too close to Ground Zero, those are the same people that protest mosques in Brooklyn and Staten Island and Tennessee and Wisconsin and California (No they're not ... these folks are NYers ...they saw this disaster up close and very personal ...stop making junk up.). What radius will they go for? There's no end to it." (Bull!) Many in the crowd opposing the center (mosque) were firefighters and construction workers (at long last!), who carried signs reading: "This is Sacred Ground to New Yorkers." One sign read: "Everything I Ever Needed to Know about Islam I Learned on 9/11." (Sounds awfully familiar, eh?) Plans for the project (mosque) include a 13-story building to house an auditorium ("Hello ...hello ...can you all hear me? Welcome to our special series on women's rights in the Islamic world. Now go home."), swimming pool (Marco Polo, anyone? We're safe! We have the Taliban Lifeguard Brigade here!)), meeting rooms ("Hi! My name is Anwar ... and I'm a terrorholic." ... "Hi! Anwar!") as well as the prayer space (MOSQUE! ...a mosque! get it?). The structure (mosque ... oh God!) is architecturally plain and does not include a minaret (as of yet! ... and is this supposed to give all solace?), dome (like other mosques? ... Oh! I see ... this isn't really a real mosque ... it's a mini, invisible mosque ... that helps alot. Thanks!) or other motifs often associated with mosques (They said the word ... MOSQUE!!!!). Some opponents have taken legal action (God bless them all!), seeking to void a ruling that would allow construction to proceed, while some construction workers have launched a Hard Hat Pledge, vowing not to work on the project. ("This sucker ain't ever goin up!")

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