Allah and alcohol for the readers read and laugh

Submitted by dhimmi no more (United States), Nov 28, 2010 at 14:04

Oh I'm not done with you our dear zee whose welfare check and the cost of his health care are paid by alcohol consuming kuffar in Lodonistan but he is not man enough to pack and go back to where he came from

>ITS your own weakness you are addressing the question to my dear brother!We are all of aware we are created by All mighty Allah.We must ask forgiveness not justification.Justification is created with his mankind

Here is your lesson today in islamic theology

1. Allah tells us in the Qur'an that our dear zee whose welfare check and the cost of his health care are paid by infidels who love to drink alcohol

ya ayuha al-ladhina amanu la taqrabu al-salata wa intum sukara

Oh darn it the Arabic! well may be you can ask your stupid mullah to tell you what it means

Do you know what the above means? Let me help you

1. It means that Muslims can drink alcohol

2. That Muslims that drink alcohol should not be drunk when praying

3. It also means that Muslims can have a beer or two enough to be happy but not drunk before praying

4. And because surat al-Nisa' was revealed in Medina it means that Muhammad used to consume alcohol past 622CE or at least until he was 52 years old (he was 40 when he recieved his so called al-mab3ath in 610CE right mr ignorant) and because he was insan kamil I will continue to consume alcohol like him until at least age 52 and I urge you to do so or you are not a good muslim right ?

What a fadiha (scandal) Muhammad used to drink alcohol

Oh there is more then Allah says that alcohol is good for Muslims as in

yasa'lunaka 3ani al-kamr wa al-maysiri qul fihuma athamun kabirun wa manafi3 lel nasi wa athmuha akbar men naf3ihihuma

Do you know what this means? It means

1. Allah is saying that alcohol (al-khamr or the fermented but also read it as al-nabidh or the wine) and gambling can be good for you and he is right becuase alcohol can be good for your heart and if you win a lottery then gambling was good for you. Logic dictates that anything has the good also has the bad as some people can have problems with alcohol and with gambling as well as eating too much halal meat can be bad for your heart right ?

2. It means that Allah is saying: Drink in moderation right our dear zee? So do you drink in moderation? If not then you are not following your Allah's words and in this case I need to tell your masters the Arabs that you our dear zee disagrees with Allah

Oh there is more Allah says

wa men thamarti al-nakheeli wa al-a3nabi tatkhidhuna menhu (sic) sukran wa risqan hasanan

ROTFL Allah is saying that we human beings can get great benifits from drinking wine! You see our dear Zee we kuffar seem to be more Muslims than Muslims themselves so go out and have a glass of wine our dear zee al-tablighee

Oh here is your bonus for today: the word menhu should be the dual menhuma! What a fadiha a kafir like me is correcting Allah's Arabic

oh there is more

yasquna men rahiqi makhtuman

let me translate this one for you

they are given wine that it sealed

ROTFL Allah serves wine in his little janna what a fadiha

oh there is more

ya ayuha al-ladhina amanu inama al-khamru wa al-maysaru wa al-ansabu wa al-azlamu rijisu men 3amali al-shaytani fa ijtanibuhuh le 3alakum taflihuna

Oh darn irt Allah changes his mind and he tells us not to drink Alcohol via his little al-nasikh wa al-mansukh or the Allah changing his mind doctrine So how come Allah did not get it the first time?

The answer is: Islam is ridiculous! What can i say

Oh Yuhanna Mashi bel talj or Johnny Walker on ice the favorite drink of your saudi masters? Allah only knew about wine and that is it

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