Not all Egyptian Muslim Men are Bad

Submitted by married woman (United States), Jul 29, 2007 at 20:38

I am a 27 year old American woman who has been married to a 25 year old Egyptian man for 1 year and 1 month now. I can attest to the hardships of a multicultural relationship but can assure you that if there is love, assuming it is real, then all else falls into place.

He and I met while I was out there on vacation. It was love at first sight and we married just two months later. Against everyone else's advice I quit my highpaying NY job and flew to live in Egypt to marry him. I got a job as a teacher there and we have been together since. I do not regret it in the least bit. He has been very good to me and we have managed to make it work. We are happy.

He spends all day with me unless we are visiting family together and only goes out to sit in the cafe, downstairs from our apartment, about once a month. He says he does not want to go too far in case I need something since I don't speak Arabic and anything can happen. He really protects me.

I converted to Islam back in September and he has been a great example for me. Teaching me to pray and encouraging me to read the hadiths. We keep eachother spiritually accountable.

Now, I am 8 1/2 months pregant and I flew back to the states to have our baby. We both cried so much over the idea of seperation but we knew we had to think of our baby first. He and I talk on the phone or the internet every day and I can even see he has lost weight because he is feeling so sad. Since I will be gone three months he opted to stay with his family, instead of staying alone, to spend time with them.

I trust my husband and I know he loves me. Is he suseptible to the weaknesses of society and human desires? Of course, I am sure we all are. However, he knows that to do anything would be to do it to Allah and his punishment would be much greater because I can always bounce back and move on. I do not need him - I love him. He also knows that I would never deny him the opportunity to get his Visa and move to the U.S. even if our marriage failed and we divorced. His future, whether he is my husband or not, matters to me because I love him. So, he knows he can leave me when ever he wants and still have his cake. I trust his feelings are sincere.

I am sorry that there are men out there that are scum. I admit I know a few Egyptian men like that out there. They will marry a woman, use her, take her money and then cheat or dump her.

My husband has never asked me for one single pound/dollar in our whole marriage. We live comfortably because I pay a high rent but he is responsible for all household amenities and our food. I have never had to give him money and I would not. I made it clear from the beginning that I was his responsibility not the other way around. It is important he take that on if he wants to claim the role of "man,"as many Egyptians like to strut around saying they are.

I am sorry to hear the bad stories but keep the faith - there is a little bit of everything out there...even if there is more of it in poor underdeveloped countries.

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