I agree

Submitted by Franny (United States), Jan 24, 2008 at 08:25

I agree with you 100% about your thoughts. If I were unfortunate enough to have been born in a country where the future basically leads no where, I also would be looking to marry a man from a country where I could live a better life, and provide my family with a better life also. We as americans (I know you are canadian) tend to look down on people who do not have the will to better themselves in life, but on the other hand, if someone marrys above their so called class, they are only doing it for selfish reasons. We, as people, really need to stop and think about what we would do in the same situation. I agree that men and women should not marry for a visa, but there is nothing wrong with searching for someone to love, that will better your life.

I am married to a turk and have been for a very long time. He had his greencard when I met him. I was married twice before to american christians, and lets just say, the marriages were horrible at best. My relationship with my muslim husband has made me a better person. He is without a doubt, the most kind, loving, and compassionate person I have ever known. I have many friends that are interested in meeting turkish men because of the example he has set. I, and my husband both agree we are not match makers, and it is for each person to find the love they are looking for. We made that mistake in the past. You see, he had a friend in Turkey and I had a friend here in the states. They were looking to meet each other, so we arranged it. He and her were an isntant match...much like I and my husband, though there was a problem. He, does not want to live in the US, she does not want to live in Turkey. Both of them have very strong family connections and neither feel they can leave their families behind. Its almost like a double edged sword. They have been flying back and forth for 7 years now...very much in love with each other, and not able to move on together, or to move on without each other.

As for your comment about if things did not work out, you would not be able to get over it etc., you must have more faith in yourself as a person. Every failed relationship is hard, and being a loving and trusting person should not make you think life would be over because of it. WE ALL make mistakes in relationships whether they be with canadian nationals, americans, or people from struggling countries. Believe in yourself and God. I also believe that not all relationships are meant to be forever, but still they are meant to be.

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