Break Up after 7 years but back together again.....

Submitted by Life is Beautiful (Ireland), Feb 23, 2008 at 18:17

Dear Sophie,

Many Thanks for your article and for sharing your story.

Unfortunatelly my heart did not stay long in the decision that I made , he came back after 3 weeks and I accepted him again. We are closed more these weeks than before and I expressed myself by telling him that I am planning to move to Italy after the summer. I missed my family and apart from my work here and him i have nothing else.

I am trying to leave UK for the last 4 years, but my heart says to stay cause of him. I postoponed my plans all the time and my time is kicking and my time to become a mother is going very fast and i do not want to end up living in uk far from my family, and without any babies because i refuse to have muslim babies. not that i am against their religion, but he is muslim and i am christian, and our children should be atheist until they will choose their own religion.

I am 7 years in a static without any dreams relationship. He told me these days that he feels the fear that I will leave that if i will say yes to have children with him muslim he will marry me and he will live with me and he will introduce me to his family. He has said that since the beginning that if I will agree for muslim chldren then he is marying me tomorrow but always i said not.

Next month he is going to his country for the wedding of his brother and again i am not invited to meet his family,I feel the european "girl" and nothing more and i love him.I am so broken these days because i started to make plans for my future to italy and i have started to sent my CV for jobs there i am scared to leave in case i am leaving the man of my life but the gaps are HUGE.

HE wants muslim children and he will not make any comprimises for that. He wants also to live in UK as he has a good job and in italy there is unemployment and he has not the language. My parents are against the whole situation,they want me back and they believe that i have to break up for my own sake and my own happiness even if he is a nice guy there is no future and also for all these i mentioned to you in my previous article.

My time is coming to leave uk in few months and we are more close than before,i mentioned that to him in daily basis and he says that he will not let me leave. Every day I wake up and I am so confused...i have strong feelings towards to him,I am vulnerable. I am facing the same questions and I am tired. Should I stay with him in UK and to make babies here muslim ones ? or to leave and to go back to Italy and make a new fresh start but I am scared if i will go back to my country and I realise that he is the man of my life and it will be too late.

I cannot make so big compromise to have muslim babies. i am scared in case he will take them and go back to his country, i am scared if my parents also be depressed from my decision as they are expecting me to go there and i cannot tell to my dad that his grandchidren will be muslim.

My God my head is going to explode from the thinking. I am discussing all these with my best friends and my sister and they think that there is no future with my man no only cause of the religion but cause of the treatment that I got from him for the last 7 years(hidden from his work,many weekends apart and he was going out with his friends and drinking,never mentioned to me to live under the same roof, he has his own flat and I have mine,get in and get out any time that it suits him and more more more) for all these also my friends and sister do not agree that things will change if i will marry him and make this big compromise and make muslim children because they believe that my happiness will be temporarily and after a while will change again.

I really need your help as all of you in this site you have more experience.

It is very hard for me to make any decision cause my blindness to this sick love. My time is passing and I am growing and maybe I will not be able to have babies.I am 35, I am scared if I will lose more precious time waiting for things to happen.

Many many Thanks for your feedback.

Looking forward to your response

Life is beautiful......

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