Hi there Isabella!

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Apr 20, 2008 at 02:43

Thanks for sharing your story with us! Even though it's about a friend, I'm glad you did, and it takes courage to put yourself out there for advice !

The thing is, I can understand your confusion. You may have read some of my posts, but I also had "friends" that I met on-line, and as a guy, I have to tell you straight up that there really is no such thing as on-line or over-the-phone "friends" in situations like these. There's usually a hidden romantic interest on some level or another, even if it doesn't transpire openly.

Moroccan culture? Islam? Honestly, it's neither. It's scam-culture is what it is. As far as being a Muslim Moroccan goes, well, there are lots of reasons why he'd pull this on you: a greencard, money, doing his sworn duty in the war against the west by marrying a western woman and raising her kids Muslim.

But I will say this: A lot of folks, even on here, or on Muslim message boards, will say that family is important. Good, strong, marriage, kids, and the like. What you won't find anywhere else is that it's predominately true, especially as traditional values erode over here, BUT IT'S SO IMPORTANT to realize that these men treat women who are NOT of their culture differently than those are.

But really, you can substitute race, religion and gender into that whole deal and the result is still the same. A quick marriage proposal and a rush to do it are often what scammers hope for. Why? Because spontaneous people BUY things, and GIVE $$$ more readily.

It's actually a sales technique. Go to the store sometime, and you'll notice how candy and gum is sometimes cheaper in the aisles, but right by the cash register, it's more expensive? It's really the same thing....less time to decide as your groceries are being wrung up and of course, no one will want to go BACK into the store! That would be...you know, weird.

I had a friend from the southern USA that I met on myspace, and she was about as decent as they come. however, about 1.5 years into our friendship, her real-life relationship was getting more and more real and deep, as in marriage. Then out of the blue, she started confessing to me all these thoughts and erotic desires she had for me. It started innocently enough, with her being friendly, telling me how she misses talking to me if a few days go inbetween talking, but eventually she got very wishy-washy about me. She would ask me about actually meeting in person (some thousand miles or so) and then she told me that she felt guilty for not telling her boyfriend about "us." I was quite dumbfounded at this, because I didn't think us talking was a big deal, but it became to be.

One week, she would ask me to call her, and I wouldn't do it, because she probably wanted phone sex or something of the like, and I asked her about it a month later, and she got all defensive and told me that "I don't see what the big deal is" when a week before she said her boyfriend might mind if we talked on the phone.

She even told me how she enjoyed our little chats, but that she loved her boyfriend and would stay with him. It was an interesting proposal, considering that I never actually made a pass at her or asked her out, unless asking someone for permission to call them (when they want to meet you in person and insist they trust you) is a solitication for a date.

Interesting how she wanted to meet in person, and yet, she went back-and-forth over whether we should even talk on the phone.

So, regarding "just friends"....BE WARY!

People just don't go around, and invest in on-line friendships (unless maybe they are bored or screwing around on the computer at work, very rare, though, most of those seem content to message boards and debates or pornography than anything else,).

HOWEVER, people will invest anything and everything in on-line RELATIONSHIPS.

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