for erica

Submitted by kelly (Egypt), May 3, 2008 at 04:00

i thinks it sounds a bit odd, i dont think he is trying to scam you - but i think if you marry this man you will be completely isolated, and that he will expect you to serve him. I'm married to an egyptian - and i live in Egypt also, i've seen this happen so many times with people i know. But its not like that for most of them, so even if he tells you it's what egyptian woman do - believe me it definitely is not.

Normally Egyptians have a long engagement period - why will you not do that? why rush straight into marriage? the period is there for you both to really get to know each other. Also you should recieve gifts of gold and land during this time - as a gift from his family to show they welcome you into their family.

And where exactly would you live in Egypt? living in some some village somewhere is a very bad sign - you will forever be an outcast as no one in small towns speak english. and you will always look different than everyone else. But if your living in somewhere like Cairo, Sharm el Sheikh or Hurgada its much better for you, as you will not be as isolated. everyone speaks english, there are constantly tourists there, so plenty of jobs for foriegn women.

Regarding what he expects of you as his wife - this is very odd. But sadly i have witnessed this before. My english friend here even converted to islam for her husband. I went one night to her house and watched her cook for her husband and his friends then i asked why we wernt eating with them and she told me 'it not the egyptian way - women eat after the men'.

i couldnt belive it - i mean my husband is egyptian too and i have never heard this. she acts like his slave - cooking and cleaning etc. But this is definately not considered normal. I asked many other egyptian women friends here about what they are expected to do and they told me that they are expected to half of everything with their husbands.

So i would definatly see what he is saying as strange. Especially about talking to other males - that is very odd. Only a very very strict Muslim would think like this. But most dont think like this in Egypt as its so impractical.

He probably thinks a woman should 'just go to her room and cry' as this is what he is used to. Most egyptian women are very fierce when angry and can definitely get what they want from their husband. Maybe his ex wife was very submissive towards him - you should definitely make it clear you will not be weaker than him - and he can not take advantage of you.

Please take care - this man sounds very odd to me, and i have seen bad things happen because women love these guys so much, they do stupid things

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