Honey, the red flags are WAVING....don't do this!!!

Submitted by FARRAH (United States), May 3, 2008 at 20:04

Annie honey, what he is planning is a Misyar marriage or "traveler's marriage". MOST college age men request this.

First they hide it from their parents WHY? the parents have ALREADY chosen a girl for him. He just has to finish his studies etc....These young men often choose OLDER women, divorced women, or Foreign women...we are considered trash to them in a sense for lack of a better word.

Anyway, the marriage is kept secret from his Muslim community...yet it is "legal" for them because he is doing this for a "reason". Anyway, they try their best NOT to have child w/you which is why an older woman is preferred. One reason he will use to divorce her is that she cannot give him a son. This type of marriage allows them to have sex according to Islamic laws. This method also allows him to avoid a "dowry" for you...and the lavish weddings that they are expected to have.

I wrote before of a website that shows weddings of different cultures. And you absolutely NEVER, EVER, see a Muslim marriage w/ older foreign ladies. I cannot stress enough our "legal" marriage is not recognized in Islam. If they want to take you to the courthouse and not to the IMAM that is the surest sign.

In other situations IF the parents find out HE WILL HAVE REASON TO DIVORCE YOU...listen to his request:: we must keep it secret from his family...he will then tell you his parents are FORCING him to marry some other girl...this is what I meant when I have stated if your man is 18-40 years and not married...there's something going on. It is normal to have wife, family in those cultures...if a man is not married people think something is wrong with him.

Hope this helps you dear....toss this fish back in the ocean.

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