re stranger in a strange country

Submitted by yasemin (Canada), May 10, 2008 at 19:34

Allow me to add some detail to this painting...Picture death threats from your husband and knowing that it's next to impossible to get a protection order ( i was told i got lucky and the judge was female - huge odd against that happening ).

Then picture trying to get the order enforced when your husband breaks it and having the police lie to your embassy saying it's not their job. keep checking over your shoulder to see if you're being followed because honor killings are still commonplace and just your existence is shaming to his family. And when he knocks you to the floor and starts choking you and you manage to open the door and scream for help, picture nobody coming because it's not their business.

Then picture being suddenly seriously ill and have suspicions but no proof and no police who'll listen. And oh ya, that black widow spider that came through the window one night...picture dealing with this little problem and developing a raving paranoia. Picture being escorted by your embassy out of his country for safety reasons.

Put this on your to-do list when you arrive - instead of wasting time seeing the sights, make friends with important locals who are friends of the prosecutors cuz one day you might need to know someone who knows someone - it's the system there. Trust me, i didn't believe the warnings - i was head over heels in love with the exotic loving man who "adored" me til eternity ( or til he achieved his goal ).

You don't know the mentality until you have talked with women at the women's shelter and learned the real culture, not what you see in the travel brochures. Sure there are bad men here, but you ain't seen nothing yet. And you'll have to deal with it all yourself. By the way, make sure to hide all sharp objects the second he starts showing signs of aggression while you're waiting to leave the country and have no money for a hotel. And never leave any food or drink unattended. Am i inventing all this ? Nope.

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