Re; Algerian man

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), May 19, 2008 at 18:38

Thanks for sharing your story!

I can see how you may be attracted to this man, but real love doesn't happen over the phone or internet. See, in order for real love to happen, you actually have to meet the person. I've had a Russian and even an American woman say they were "in love" with me before we even met. It's utterly ridiculous.

How can you possibly love someone by e-mailing them twice?

You can't.

I was in a similar situation like you once. I dated a woman I met on-line and lived an hour away from me. The entire time, she was seeing other men and women, while using my credit card and bank accounts. She would call me in the middle of the night crying saying how she couldn't pay her bills, and I was dumb enough to believe her, because I thought we were in love. Ha! Was I mistaken. She would even go so far as to threaten to sleep with other people or even commit suicide if she didn't get her way.
All of these are sales tricks. Sob stories? Waitresses and strippers use them to get higher tips. Car salesman and real estate agents might if they find themselves in a bind. And suicide? It's the latest blackmailing trick in the new century.

So, I was paying for her to have cyber sex and sex with other people on the computer I had brought her. Talk about irony. I was her back-up plan, and if in all her searching she couldn't find another man who looked better (which is really all she cared about) then she would have settled for me.

First of all, if you know that sending someone you have never met money is bad, then why do you do it? If you truly believe the women on this site, then don't send him any more money, because I promise you'll never ever see it again. It's a donation, pure, plain and simple. Chances are, he's laughing in his sleeve at you over this as each payments comes in.

Regarding murder: With a few notable exceptions (like Iraq), murder happens amongst people who know people, and yes, jealousy and money are strong motives for such a terrible act. This is a big problem for people from the West who date people from Latin America. I think of three murder cases that involved international dating. I once talked to a woman from Suriname who wanted to meet up with me in the mountains of southern Mexico. I wonder what for.

Sometimes, Western women move to the Middle East for so-called love, and they end up stuck in a conservative home and are not allowed to leave. Freedom as they know it is gone, perhaps forever. So if you want to end up like that, be my guest. And the Canadian embassy will not come to rescue, I promise you that. No country will EVER stake a personal citizen's relationship over the affairs of state. Trust me, I've worked for three different government agencies, and it will NEVER happen! Why? Ambassadors and embassies represent GOVERNMENT, NOT THE PEOPLE.

One reason why he can't come over here or vice-versa is because they don't think what you two have is real.

But, it sounds like with the internet communication patterns you describe, your man isn't interested in that, so long as you keep sending him money. He has really no reason to change the status quo of your relationship, because he's getting what he wants: your hard-earned money. This is especially true if he doesn't talk to you for a few days at time, which means he's probably got other women (or even men) that he is talking to.

I realize this has been going on for a long time for you, but men like this come from a culture where patience is a virtue with great reward. It's nothing like Canada or the USA where we'll run each other over to get what we want.

If your man is making excuses, something is definately wrong. I caught my internet women fooling around on-line, and she always made excuses, believe me, I've heard them all:

--I didn't sign off because I feel asleep

--I'm not as strong as you are, Luigi. I can't help it.

--My family made me angry

--My roommate made did this and made me feel XXX

You get the idea.

I don't think you are crazy or stupid, I just think you've got a good heart, want to be happy like any normal human being. But you have to understand that's how these liars and scammers like to work their magic--on the unsuspecting and innocent.

Lost Time, I know this isn't easy for you to hear, and I do sympathsize, but my main concern is are going to have the strength to leave him. I won't lie to you, that on-line relationships are the most unfair because they FEEL real, and when broken, a loss will be felt. No one can tell you what to do, but I've found that hanging out with people or meeting someone else in real life can really help you get over this.

And I'm sure he'll wail and shout and cry and yell or maybe one, a few, or all of those. My woman did too, until I told her I would stop sending the money and that there was no way she was getting possession of the things I had brought her that her parents gave back to me. Then, she just quit altogether. Why? No more money, no more material things.Time to find someone else too mooch off of? Maybe. It's what on-line scammers do.

But consider the alternative. Can you really, honestly, sit there are be lied to day after day line after line knowing this isn't real? I know that you are probably torn, but I've been there before, and so have a lot of women on this site. If we can get through this, I know you can too. See, with my internet woman, I made the mistake of thinking I had to be with her no matter how she acted or treated me. But I didn't.

I didn't need this, no other woman on here needs it, and neither do you.

You can do better than him.

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