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For SherryReader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), May 22, 2008 at 19:56 Hi Sherry! Let me just say that there are plenty of American men out there worth your time! There's lots of nice guys, trust me. I wanted to take a crack at your question: Why do women fall for these men? 1) Women don't hold them to the same standards. They seem to put up with a lot more with an on-line man than a real one. My myspace woman was like that---BEFORE we met. After we met, she sensed that I wasn't going to let her go, which brings me to point two: 2) The men on-line aren't afraid to end the relationship if they have to. Some will bawl like babies if you threaten to leave, by in my experience and from what women say on here, they are not afraid to confront you. This is the opposite of how many Western men behave. Many of them are just honored to be dating someone and don't have a clue about treating a woman. 3) The charms and chiviarly bascially disappeared once secularism decided to stay. Let's face it: A lot of men THINK they know all about women, but really don't. Charms of eggplant? That's true in a lot of cases. 4) These men want families. One trend that Dr. Pipes touches in this blog is that European women marry Muslim men in Italy. Well, this stems from the fact that many EU men want to party their whole lives, but women want families. That's why many of them marry and convert to Islam, because they want a family, not because they necessarily think Islam is the right religion. It's done out of love. But are Muslim men the first choice? Not always, and not really. The Italian men who don't mess around all their lives and who want families, many seek them in other countries. In fact, this is really why interracial, intercultural dating is on the rise, more or less. Outside social pressures and the idea that you end up alone or with someone who's a little different than you. It's not as automatic as finding someone in your culture. 5) Tolerance. There always seems to be people who think that skin colour and culture are all that, and they just want someone to show off and show how tolerant they are of other cultures. It also gives them a chance to come on blogs like these and brag about the man they are with and it makes them feel all warm and fuzzy inside. In the USA in the 1960s during the civil rights era, sociological studies found that many of the people who dated interracailly did so just to prove they weren't racists. The 1960's also featured some of the highest divorce rates in our nation's history. Go figure. 6) On-line dating is easy. Let's be realistic, here. Half the battle for people who are looking to date is finding someone who is even interested. Like I said to AA in the last post, men fear rejection, and women fear looking like sluts or hurting a man's feelings. Going to dating sites means everyone there is looking for someone. If you aren't, you're the outcast The general, unwritten rule with on-line communication is that you can threaten, "love," hate whomever and whoever, and afterwards, you can go back to being your old self again. 7) Opposites attract. They do, no question. In his e-book Dating Secrets Revealed, Marius Panzeralla notes attraction does slice through age, religon, race, ect. and christine had noted that previously on here. HOWEVER, he also noted that sociological studies show that people who have successful relationships have many things in common and are similar. This data is clearly reflected in census data despite stereotypes. In the USA. some Asian men complain that too many Asian women date white men and some say too many Black men date white women. Here are the facts: Most white women prefer (97%) white men when ncome is equal, according to a recent survey. Most Asian women date Asian men. And so on and so forth. Advocates of tolerance and diversity and race-mixing can't stand this, but it's true. I would even argue that was the whole basis for segregation in the USA south: Because white fathers and black fathers did NOT want their daughters to date interracially. I've sure stirred the pot with those ideas on posts before, but the truth is, well, most people just can't handle it. This is a large part of the dating philosphy that marriage MUST be more than attraction. Marius also writes about the classic love triangle that was developed in the 1980's, a psycho-social relationship model. To have a real relationship, you need passion, intimacy and committment. Without passion, for instance, you only have friendship. Let's face it: Most Western men have no idea that you need passion (known to women as chemistry) to have a working relationship. Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments". << Previous Comment Next Comment >> Reader comments (21922) on this item
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