Thank you for explaining in relation to islam

Submitted by broken heart (United Kingdom), Jun 4, 2008 at 04:49

Thank you for the background on the relationships between men and women under Islam. Hamid is very conflicted, a strong faith, but desire for a good life in the secular world. His faith rules his morals and his intentions but the weakness of the human drives him to do things I am sure he is ashamed about. I understand his weakness as it is only human to desire things, particularly when they are flaunted in front of you by tourists with which he interacts daily.

In my heart I believe he had no intention to hurt me, but his desire for material things made him do the things which he ultimately did. I have not heard from him, though he knows I wanted to and that I would again give him some of the material things he craves. It is this that convinces me that he is good at heart and trying desperately to live within his religion which would frown upon what he does for material gain. I also beleive that this is why our week together was such a rollercoaster. He would be happy sometimes and then distant and almost angry - the disdain I attribute to feeling like a prostitute. At one point, he said that we would be intimate if we both wanted to, not just me, as he was not an animal that could be bought and used for my purpose alone.

It is sad in any part of the world that people turn to what I would term as prostitution because there is no other means to obtain material things. It must be a great compromise when you first begin doing this and a nightmare to live with. I could tell that Hamid was uncomfortable showing his gifts to his acquaintances as I am sure it would brand him more publicly as a gigolo, something of which he is not proud of. Of particular concern was how he would gradually reveal his gifts to his family as he claims to live with his mother and sister.

I doubt he is currently married, though he clearly wants to be with a local girl that does not work and that bears him many children. He is trying to find a way to obtain a "clean" means of financial support before he is able to do this. Again, I now understand that this too is part of Islam.

I feel lucky that he was not a complete and mindless louse, but again that was the charm that caught me. I cannot erase my feelings for him, but I know now that it has ended forever and that I served a purpose for him. I view the material things I gave him as a gift for the happiness he gave me while I knew him. The pain he caused is a lesson for me to learn from.

Thank you for helping me put this in context within Islam which really helps clarify some of what he referenced as cultural differences.

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