My worst experience

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Jun 16, 2008 at 19:46

Let's get this out of the way first:

I'm not going to lump ALL Moroccan men into the category of liars and scammers. That's not the problem. The problem is intercultural dating. There are plenty of good, decent Moroccan men out there, Lilly, if there weren't Morocco wouldn't have the birthrate that it does.

The thing is, Lilly, pretty much every woman who comes on here wants to think they have the real thing. The argument that not everyone uses you? I've heard that one before. Many times. In fact, several women on here have meet with the families of their prospective man. Sometimes, the expectation is that once you married and get him moved over to your country, the family will expect to follow suit....at your expense, of course.

The difference between relationship scammers and say, the Nigerian letter scam, is that dating scammers are not afraid to confront you or to talk about how honesty is important. I've had several bogus women try and use that on me. I would start the conversation by telling them "I value honesty and loyalty" and they would say "I agree." You're not going to get them to sweat under the collar.

What you MUST understand, Lilly, is that dating someone outside of your own culture is not a common practice----ANYWHERE in the world.

That includes Moroccan men. Most would prefer to marry within their culture.

I know this because of census and immigration data. This data pretty much kills all stereotypes.

Like here in the USA: that all white women want men of different skin color for sex. What does the census say: 98% of married white women in America are married to white men.

What about the idea that White men are always getting Asian girls? Pales in comparison to the number of Asian women married to Asian men.

The crux of my arguments often boil down to sheer numbers. Most international marriages fail. Heck, lots of marriages fail period. I've read that 70% of marriages between a Russian woman and American man fail, 50% between Canadians and Chinese fail. If you were an American man dating a girl from Panama, China or Russia, I would be telling you the same thing.

To a lot of Muslim men, Western women are seen as play things. Race is not really a factor. Women of African, Hispanic, Native and White background have all posted on here. It's being a non-Muslim that's the issue.

If you look at Europe, they have a rape epidemic in Norway, Sweden and France caused by Muslim men who rape women for not wearing the veil. It doesn't matter what skin color you have, no veil, means you're worthy of a rape. It's gotten so bad in Oslo that the medical units can't even keep up. In France, first and second generation immigrant girls are literally under siege in inner-city complexes that are like little Saudi Arabias. Some of the French citizens are even moving out because of it, and because the worst the rapists get are probation. Nice, huh? Rape a teenage girl and get off on probation.

One of the rapists, Hamid, was interviewed. He said it was okay to f*** Swedish women because they've all had sex before. When asked if he would ever marry one, he said he would never marry a Swedish sl++, (smirks, and catches himself from laughing), I mean, woman. Instead, he said when the time comes (ie done screwing Swedish girls), he'd settle down and marry a Muslim woman from his country, because she was certainly a virgin and a good girl.

Lilly, my experiences relevant to this forum come in to broad categories:

1) I have tried on-line dating and I've tried making friends over the internet

2) I've investigated it.

3) Despite efforts to discredit me based on the idea I've never had a relationship with a Moroccan man, I do happen to be a man myself.

4) I am an experienced blogger.

The experience that brought me here? I simply want to help out others by using my experiences. By the time I found this site, my notorious on-line relationships were history.

Lilly, when I post on here, I respond mostly to people who ask for advice. As an advisor, I look for certain signs and behavioral patterns.

The worst experience I ever had and that I mention the most involved, ironically, an American woman. I refer to her as the myspace woman. We met on a dating site, met several times over the course of 1.5 years, and communicated over myspace and cell phone.

Like most other relationships, this one started out nice. Her and I talked pretty much every night. About a month or so into the talking, before we even met, she told me that she loved me. This was my first warning sign. Eventually, we got together officially even though we had never met. After we met for the first time, we went out, made-out a little. However, after I left and went back home, that's when things changed. I would guess it's because I wasn't as good looking as she had hoped.

A week later was when she called and started to complain about money. She didn't ask for it outright, but the idea was to get me to offer to pay, which I did.

Then, shreds of who she really was began to show. She would call at 3 am in the morning, or try and message me on-line, leaving several messages, telling me about her bisexual nature and how she was in a relationship with another woman, whom she had left the second we started dating. She would also call and talk about her best friends's problems. The eerie part about this was that both of them lived over 800 miles away from her and they had never met.

When I stayed with her for a week in her dorm room during X-mas, Two of her X-boyfriends called her, both in the wee hours of the morning. One did this every single night. One of them, her best friend, she had never even met.

After three months, she told me that she wanted to break up. She just said that she wanted to be fair. What this really meant was that before she left me, she was cheating on her girlfriend, and she didn't want to hurt me, yet she couldn't resist the temptation to tell all those guys who wanted phone and cybersex NO, so she left. After that, we kind of dated, but it was more we were f+++ buddies.

In March, she finally decided it was time to go see her best friends. She had them thinking she was coming, and one of them sent her $200 for the trip.

She bought a ticket, she claimed, but never even went.

In April of that year, she decided to date her old girlfriend again. Despite the fact that she screwed her over in 200 bucks, she agreed. I later found out that the other best friend, a man from France, had raped her three times, but they were still best friends. That was okay, you see, because was drunk all three times and really didn't mean any harm by it.

I caught her red-handed and I wanted to know why she would date someone else while I was sending her money. She said she was just doing to make her happy for a little, but eventually, she would stop talking to both of her best friends. Eventually, it sounded like she did. Once I came back that summer.

I wanted to keep her, though, and have a relationship with her. The next mistakes I made were huge: I brought her an ipod, just to make her feel better and to keep from having sex with other people, and when I finally got to see her again at summer, I bought her a computer. That was the worst thing I could do. Eventually, I even helped her get a car.

Even after all of this, she decided it was time to see other people besides me. I found that she still had a new dating profile on-line, so I made one to and I made sure that she could see it. She totally panicked and came running back.

But it wouldn't last. Eventually, she meet a guy on myspace who was engaged to another girl with a kid, and she was putting the moves on him. The next thing she wanted was to move in with me and get a place of our own, and she said that she wanted the guy to move in with us, because he was having problems with her.

About that time, her friends would call me for sport and to harrass me, especially if they answered her phone when I called. I finally got to talk to engaged girl, and she had said the plan was for the four of us to move in together. I told her, that's not what I heard. She was left to ponder that, as was I. Eventually, I figured out that my woman wanted him to move in because she liked him, even though he was engaged.

September was when things really unravelled. Her parents made her give me back the things I bought her since we weren't official. Once I got the computer, I searched through all the logs. I found out that four HOURS after we had gotten together, she had sent off naked pictures herself to other men. I also found out she had used the computer I had brought her to have cybersex with other men, at least once a week. We never did this. I also logged in to her school e-mail, myspace and facebook account and found she had been consistently cheating on me.

I was very, very angry. I just went ballistic. I tracked down the usernames and accounts of the people who had called me and cheated on me with her, and I just railed at them. It was a dark hour for me. They would usually just call me names, but I played an entirely different game.

I found out all of the men who she had cybersex with and threatened to tell their girlfriends, and as for all of her friends who called, I tracked them down on myspace and bitterly confronted them, threatening them with legal action, especially those who had threatened me.
I also e-mailed several of my ex's friends just to make her mad.

I swear, I didn't leave a stone unturned, and I made no exception. What I said was cold and heartless, to say the least. And that was a weakness of mine. See, I didn't just swear at them or call them names, I found out tragic events about them or people they were dating and I e-mailed them and I mentioned the events and I rubbed them in. I even brought their families and children into the discussion. I never threatened them, but it must've felt like an on-line Hiroshima.

I'm sure they were shaken as heck to know I found them out. It eventually led to the deletion of several profiles, and several of them changed IM names. But it was very clear that they would never, ever, cross me again.

I can't say that I'm proud of that, but those are the kind of people you can expect to find on-line. Yup, I used to be one of them, at least during the moments when I confronted those people. It brought out the worst in me, because I was hurt. What I should have done was let it go.

I don't think I've ever shared this in such a detail with anyone, but it's important to realize, that a lot of time over the internet, people don't say what they mean at heart. This can be vivid insults, or it can be positive, like love.

Well, now you know about my worst. Wasn't a Moroccan man, but hope this post helps.

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