I have decided to go with my heart

Submitted by tatlikiz (United States), Jun 21, 2008 at 03:32

After days of praying,stressing and headaches and agonizing over this ,I talked with my sister.

She gave me great advice : to continue to pray and ask God to lead me in the right direction, and follow my heart.

I slept great that night and woke up feeling better.

I decided to go with my feelings .

I got back together with my boyfriend .

We are both close to 30 in age.

I do not feel as though I am being blackmailed or played with .

Being a difficult woman to be with ,I have tested him a few times and he always passes.

And let me tell you not too many people can put up with me and my mood swings. : )

. I do not make it easy for any man.I'm surprised that he hasn't wanted to leave me yet. lol

I've had a few guys (in real life) cry or tell me they can't live without me when I tried to break -up with them.

And quite a few guys (american & foreign in real ) have told me they loved me and talked about marriage pretty soon into the relationship.

So this isn't the first time for me : )

Even though we have talked about getting married and I seen a dress I like and the cake that I would like ,nothing is for sure yet.

As a woman who has had my share of many relationships in real life ,on the phone and online,I feel as though I am experienced enough to know the difference between an honest guy and a liar.

Yes I know,we haven't met face to face.

No I'm not gullible ,naive or stupid.

I was not even attracted to him until after I got to know him (yes he is attractive ,but not really my type),so it's not lust .

I am told often that I'm a beautiful woman, so I'm not desperate.

I have friends and family that I spend time with,so I'm not lonely.

To be honest with everyone,reading all these stories here and on other websites drove me crazy with doubt, suspicion, and fear.

Something that I didn't really feel before.

Who knows what will happen.

Maybe like most of my relationships my feelings will fade away and I'll end up leaving him.

Maybe he and I will meet and fall more in love. And have a great story to share and write about.

Maybe in 3 years I'll be on here telling my sad story and trying to warn other women or what I've been though,wishing I would've listened to everyone.

Love is just a chance you have to take online or in real life.

I've been hurt before ,so if I end up getting hurt again,I'll get over it.

With God in my life and on my side I can get over and through anything. : )

I appreciate everyone who have shared their thoughts and opinions about my situation.

Thanks to all and God Bless.

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