To broken heart re remorse

Submitted by yasemin (Canada), Jun 26, 2008 at 17:21

Quote: I often wonder if they have any sense of remorse for the pain they cause. Having discussed this with western men who hop around with women, my conclusion is that no they don't. They just move on and vaguely remember us in the past. Like a glass of cold water on a hot day, we hit the spot. The moment was enjoyed but does not dominate the thoughts and actions of the man, we were there at the right place at the right time.

Your words are very powerful. Their ability to so easily forget you is precisely what hurts the most, even more than the loss of someone you love. Knowing that you are so insignificant, so easily forgotten, especially if there was a marriage involved.

Knowing that you were just a tool, an object. This is why the wound of abandonment takes so long to heal and leaves a huge scar. I will never forget the email he sent me that said something that chilled me to the bone. "Forget me. I've already forgotten you."

The only time my husband thinks of me now is when he pays the pathetically small alimony each month. He's remorseful only for having married me - the woman ( me) who worked with the german embassy to stop him leaving for germany to marry the other woman illegally, the woman who then had his name placed on all the first world country watchlists and the woman who refuses him divorce so he marry the pre-planned wife legally. Their remorse is totally self-centred. And whenever we would meet to talk ( ie his opportunity to badger and threaten ), while the divorce was going on, if i started to cry he would threaten to get up and leave, not because he hated to see my sadness, but because i might actually stir up some guilty feelings. They prefer to do their killing and walk away with clean hands.

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