Thank you Luigi

Submitted by broken heart (United Kingdom), Aug 6, 2008 at 15:32

Your feedback is greatly appreciated. As time has gone by I have decided that I will not help him with the visa. There is a proper way to do things and I do not want to jeopardize my freedom or peace of mind, so no money for visa.

Each day I want him less. But I am still off to see him this weekend. Interestingly I am not as excited as during the previous visits. The flame is starting to dwindle - thank god !!! I am sure it will be more of the same. One thing that I have compromised on, but know I cannot do so long term, is the lack of curiosity or desire to do anything. I suppose when you live with limited options you don't explore your boundaries too much. Me, I can't sit still. So I will take my books and running shoes, but I know in my heart (really !!!!) that this is near the end.

It has been eye opening in many ways. My desperation and naivete has really been highlited to me, but also the difference in cultures and how deeply ingrained they are and how much they affect how we look at life and how we live it. This is not about religion, it is about growing up with limited hope which so much of the world has to live with.

I feel lucky every day that I have the background, passport and opportunities that I have. We are a small percentage of the world and we should celebrate it. However, this does not eliminate the need for empathy and responsibility for the rest of the world.

I will update you upon my return. Thank you again

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