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To Margaret opinions of "sex" and Converting~ Muslim/IslamReader comment on item: Advice to Non-Muslim Women against Marrying Muslim Men Submitted by annonymous in usa (United States), Oct 26, 2008 at 05:23 I agree a "GOOD" Muslim would tell you it is sinful to have sex without marriage...Keep in mind too that not all Muslims consider themselves as a "GOOD" Muslim therefore they will have sex or "make Love" to a woman if he is planning on marrying here anyway. It is sometimes "Overlooked" by him but he would not tell his father if the father is VERY MUSLIM in his faith.... .For instance, I was traveling to a City in Morocco and I was not able to make the trip but before my trip was cancelled, his mom and sisters knew I was coming but he would not tell his father but he knew his sisters/mom would keep his secret. It was not till my later trip was scheduled that he finally told his father and all his father said was son make sure you do not have sex without marriage. We had planned marriage but he was waiting to tell them til I had my Passport and ticket in hand. Now that I have these, He has discussed with mom/father and family that we are marrying once I am there and he would travel to USA since i have kids in school and we have discussed us moving back once my kids are older/married. My Fiance did ask me if I rather wait to have sex til after we are married. He wanted to make sure I felt respected by him but at same time he let me know he was not sure he could wait if tempted or the mood arises so I left it to him since I have been married. I want his first marriage to be special. He has a sister whose husband left her for another woman...he divorced her and he drinked. But Muslims are not also suppose to drink but they sometimes do! This same family has accepted this man back into daughters life since he has been sober for one year. Not all Muslims live strictly by the Koran. The ones who do not will tell you they are not good Muslims even though they may have strong beliefs/prayers. Not all Muslims may go to Mosque as often as they should... Not all Muslim girls are virgins too. Some as prostitutes. I know because my Fiance's brother was with one while we have been dating. My Fiance has told me the women there do this and oral sex for their family when they are poor but these girls are also looked at as being "Dirty Ones"....so in closing, having sex with you does not mean he is trying to disrespect you or he does not love you. Use your better judgement. Listen closely to conversations and if he is really there for you or just telling you off the wall stuff to get what he wants from you. You can tell! Does he question you about bank finances, what you own, what you can do for him and his family?..... My Fiance never questions any of these things. That is why very few on here know their guy loves them and the other women are here cause they are seeing major red flags & it gives the rest of the Muslims or Moroccans a bad name. I also don't believe all relationships are "Doomed" as well. If you truly love one another all is possible. Converting- again if he loves you and is a truly beautiful person, he would not ask you to convert. My fiance told me that it needs to be in my heart not converting because I think he wants me to and he said I will not push my Christianity on him and he will not do same with Islam....My worries were we need to be one but he says no and this is with me telling him I want to convert and learn Islam and Have an open mind but he also knows I believe in Christianity but I also don't go to church but he knows I am a good person and woman. I hear too on here about the Muslim having kids and woman can't leave the Muslim country with them. Do you not realize this holds true for USA children too. I can not take my children even to visit another country unless their father signs for me to get them a passport.....same thing! It is to protect the father's right as a father! Back to Muslims beliefs...my Muslim's cousin wants to marry him. She is a pharmacist and has been married and divorced. She is 4 years older than him. His mom, after the cousin's mom came to his mom to ask "what is your opinion "?-he "marrying "?-she"...she is interested in him...The mom comes back and lets my Fiance know this...Twice she has approached him with this subject. Cousins are allowed to marry! He told his mom "Its my life and I am Free and he said at the end she was ok with him and his choice. But the mom knows I have had surgeries and can not have more children and all moms want this for their sons of course. She has two sons. Reason I bring this up is he said he hears this cousin sokes and drinks and he is not interested in her to point if she comes over to visit he leaves the family home without saying hi to her cause he does not want her to feel he is interested in her. I told him this is sad cause regardless they are family! His words" yes she is cousin thats why i dont wanna hurt her and better dont treat her vey good or she wll think im agree . I dont even say hi....They say she likes me but I think she wanna get marry with me just to have my kids. " So I close this just saying Listen and watch and really know if your relationship is good and how well you understand and play with one another and how much he lights up when talking to you verses just pacifying you with his time. If he truly loves you there would be no excuses or red flags and he would be very open amd honest with you. He should not fidgit if you ask him anything and if he seems to be more interested in what you can do for him or even talk about it, get rid of him. There are good Muslim men out there!
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