Dear Isa, Some thoughts and a thoughtful response---Marriage, Turkey, Turkish man, "Green card", on-line dating

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Nov 23, 2008 at 16:32

Hello there Isa, and welcome back!

I went back and read your post earlier this month, and I can clearly see and understand how this has been a trying time for you!

The thing is, getting involved with someone who is married is really a bad idea. You say this has been going on for a year, and while that has been a long time, I still cannot believe that he would choose you over his wife in the end. It just does not happen that way very often, I think.

Isa, I actually just got out of a dating relationship with a young woman who broke up with her fiance. She called me, complained about his behavior and rightly so: he called her and her work and tried to get her into trouble.

In the end, Isa, she went back to him. She choose him over me despite my treating her like a princess.

Honestly, I think that you are wasting your time with this man. I understand that it is hard and downright scary at the prospect of leaving him, Isa. But I can assure you this will not end well for you. Even if you two get married, he will not divorce his wife and you will always be a second to him. Besides that, Isa, he could very well just being using you for a visa or green card.

I really hope you will ascend beyond your feelings for and trust your female intuition!

Think of this like a natural guard against the advanced planning men like this man to take advantage of you and your feelings for him which he is clearly prepared to do!

Please respond if you want to talk more, and read and post on here as much as you need to. Don't be a stranger, Isa, we are here to help, ok?

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