To Lisa

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Dec 17, 2008 at 23:06

NOT ALL CULTURAL MARRIAGES FAIL and I don't care about your statistics....

You should, because you could become one as the old saying goes.

They all do not, but if you look at the successes on here, they met their man in their own Westernized country and had more similarities than differences.

marriage is what two people make of it!

Yes, but not much can be made across the ocean or on the internet or over the phone.

and you have a lot of growing up to do at 27. You have not experienced half of what I have experienced in my lifetime!

Is that right? It's very clear to me you have no clue what you are getting yourself into. You are too wrapped up in your man's culture, youth appearance and charm to care.

As for me, yes, other than Lina I am the youngest poster, but I grew up with internet and I've been through this before and I've investigated. Most of the women on here have been married and too busy with their own lives prior to the divorce and probably have only used the internet for more professional purposes. In short, they have no idea what kind of people are on-line and how sinister they can be. It's like meeting a total stranger in your back alley.

You talk about cons and acting like I am naive..

Going to another country to visit someone you met on-line is pretty naive; especially when you spend all this time trying to defend it on a public blog and then whining when someone criticizes you.

.well guess what Luigi you don't know me at all...

You've already communicated more to me than you realize. Your mere presence on here, the length of your response, the content of them from the technical communication (ie incomplete sentences) and the rabid, blind defense of your fling with this man tell me all I need to know. I've seen this exact same scenario too many times before.

You don't know the strong person I am....How can you? Im not one of thes rich westerners you have in mind with credit cards and bank accounts...My dad sold drugs...died in prison after everything was confiscated even down to our pots and pans and he died in prison after serving 10 years because he would not rat on anyone! I

I'm very sorry to hear that, Lisa. But I can see now why you think you can find this happiness on the internet. Please have faith in meeting someone in person, Lisa.

I have worked since I was 16... put myself through high school and graduated got a great job raised kids without help from family so don't try and post that I am stupid or naive or don't know what I or he feels. I am headstrong and independent always have been and were taught to not let people walk all over you so therefore...my long posts to you...you can't just leave things alone...let me ask you this? You keep posting about me...why are you so fascinated in my life or if my relationship will last...its really none of your business...

I admire you for taking control of your life at an early age.

It would be silly for me to say you are stupid, Lisa. I've pretty much made the same mistake. But I do think this is a stupid decision.

I like your questions, so allow me to answer them: I am doing this out of charity. Pure, plain and simple. I realize the second I start typing it is not what people want to hear, but sometimes, that is what is best for us. I wish I had listened to my family and friends when I was seeing my myspace woman.

I have no doubt that you are strong and independent, but even if you are the most activist feminist, I would pick a strong Muslim man to win that battle any day. I see it all over Europe. The feminists who have spent the better part of their lives fighting Christianity and Judaism yield on every front to Islam.

He's going to keep wearing you down, Lisa. It's what they do and they do it well. Very patiently.

I post here to let others know in same situation these men are just men...not exotic or any different than you try and portray them..

Then why don't you leave this man and find someone decent here in America?

...sure some have had bad experiences but there are some here to that has posted their marriages have last for over 10 years but you are so sure mine and others will not...you can't know this just like I can't but guess what its MY LIFE and if it lasts 3 months..

Yeah, the thing about being married is that it is not the finish line by any means, and if their lives are so great, what on earth are they doing on-line? No one has directly answered that question, and I can guess why.

I highly doubt you will shrug this off as missed chance if this man ends up using you. I think you'll find the experience to be most miserable.

And I hope since it's your life you won't need the embassy to bail you out and waste my tax dollars on your North African fling.

.its still my life and I don't ask you to analize it! I don't ask you for your opinions on my life or choices..

That's okay. The best part about talking to me is that you do not have to.

...not everyone is like you or like your old cheating girlfriend...

Actually, many of the cases on here are much worse.

.Like I said they have money....They have more than I do ...and his family and he both knows this...He is not looking for riches....

There are plenty of reasons besides money for a man to screw you over. You are 42 and I had hoped you would know this.

.and one day we will move to Morocco and yes i will convert to Islam and yes they have Mosque in my town and Moroccans here too..

That's fine. You don't have to convert to Islam. Christianity is booming in Africa, even in Morocco, and its mostly Muslims that convert.

...and no we didn't just meet on-line and got engaged as quick as you imply...so if you going to post your little scenerios please post them correctly...we have talked LIVE CAM from each's bedroom from our first on-line meeting and we both were on dating sites and as soon as we met..

Oh my gosh! LIVE CAM! Why, that makes it ALL okay!

Really, Lisa, that's been said on here before too. Can you touch your man in person? Can you mirror his motions, feel his kiss, gaze into his eyes without the screen in the way? NO!

Cam or no cam, meeting over the internet is NOT the same as a real date. You're getting a fraction of the real experience at best.

.we both deleted our sites......

Yeah, so did my myspace and I after we met the second time. She had others, though that I did not know about.

Oh, and BTW, did you have to ask him to do this?

10 months! EVERY single day! He is a good man! ...

You've met him ONCE. How could you possibly know that.

We talked about where we wanted this relationship to go and isn't taht what meeting and dating is unless you are a player? ...

You've met your man once and his motives are suspect.

You can't possibly know if his family doesn't like me so why the bitter nasty remarks..

Neither do you for certain. Just because people are nice and civil does not mean they like you.

And I have not written any bitter or nasty remarks, so you can drop that.

.you are so sure everyone is a fraud....

Not everyone, but your situation is screaming with red flags, and this man has you hook, line and sinker.

.like I said I once offered to pay his net bill and he refused....you know this i posted it so don't try and make everything I say into something bad.....and go back and read too..

If you are offering this man money, that is not a good sign. Why did you even know he needed it paid? I'm sure you did not just offer to do that out of the blue. He obviously did something to get you to suggest it.

.did I post his lawyer friend was in instant message with me? Hell no! I

said we met him to help us with free legal paperwork we needed while I was there...free of charge and asa good friend he took us to lunch at his expense and rode around SiDi Bouzid beach with us and took pics of us while we past time waiting for offices to open..........

Yeah, that's how a lot of business deals go down, with lots of freebies. Works pretty well on people, that's why they do it.

.you read this but you wanted to imply something to your liking as usual.....Tell it like it is if you going to tell it!!...

I do, I'm just not saying what you want to hear.

.It will be a year by the time I go back on my second trip to marry...Its my life so leave it alone....if I want your advice I will ask for it....but I don't see myself asking a kid.....Lisa From USA

I would watch the insults, especially since your man is not that older than I am. Those who do not ask for advice often need it regardless.

And I wonder whose the one acting like a kid on here.

Just look at you, Lisa. Another long essay and you are so emotional that you cannot even think straight. Just like the other man-defenders on here.

I don't see how this will work out.

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