Response to Lisa from USA & Apology for on-line lawyer mix-up

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Dec 27, 2008 at 00:42

First of all, Lisa, I do owe you an apology. In an earlier post, I had gotten your story and Missy's story mixed up regarding the on-line lawyer. For the record so readers know, you did not talk to a lawyer on-line.

Thank you Lina. I am sure some of your best qualities may even come from your Moroccan step-dad...

Gee, what a shock that you would say that about a Moroccan man.

.I agree with everything you said. There is one sister I have not met (she was away in Europe)and just tonight he overheard her on the phone with his mom asking his mom questions and making negative comments to her like "He could be in trouble cause I have kids" and things like "He must be carefiul American's are not easy" and he was upset and protective and stopped the conversation cause he does not want this bad jealous sister to try and put bad ideas into his moms mind which is same as some are doing here....

Yeah, I know you are referencing me here, but listen carefully to this:

"could be in trouble because I have kids" and "Americans are not easy".

That's scammer lingo if I ever heard it, Lisa. I think you are in trouble here.

Nora thank you for your kind words. People like you, Lina , and Isis have an open mind on this blog and you can tell from your posts you are good honest women who do not judge others so harshly. You are all like me somewhat...

Translation: you agree with me, so I like you.

But I really do not think you understand how this works, Lisa. Some of the relationship defense posters would say anything to make their own situations feel better, even at your expense.

Welcome to the internet, folks.

you need to "see with eyes first-hand" what is written here or go out and ask or search for answers before believing some of the misled opinions or rumors written on this blog..

The only misled posts I see are those who defend relationships. The louder, longer and stronger the defense, the more issues there are. Does not sound great for your prospective man, does it I'll even bet some of you spend more trying to figure out what to say to me than time you spend talking to your man.

. then there are the few disgruntled women wanting others to have just as miserable a life as they keep holding on to and will not let go ,so therefore they will see fault in everything and everyone.

No, just in scams like your engagement and pretty much every other "relationship" and "marriage" on here.

How long are you going to sing this tune, Lisa?

These women/men will take this bitterness into their own new relationships. Then there are the sites on the net that mislead too and we believe to be facts.

Those would be the dating sites where the men discussed on here are met.

....I try to look deep into the hearts and minds of others. I can see good and bad in people and I ask so many questions

Kind of hard to do with meeting someone for a brief period only once and over the internet.

He thinks the past should stay in past and can create issues/problems and doesn't see the importance of the past so he NEVER asks me about my past lovers or past man friends.

Maybe because he does not see the relevance and deep thinks you should not have any man friends?

We do argue over this sometimes but he is headstrong and stubborn too and tells me if he needs it he will ask ( we do consider ourselves already married in our hearts)

I can understand your attraction to this man, but that is a dangerous, foolhardy assumption. You have only met this man once.

but I know he will not ask....He has not in the 10 months I have known him....I want to help him but he will not allow it.... I also know this may be a good thing after what I read here.

Gee, and I thought we were misleading you, Lisa.

Also Immigration will be able to read all our e-mails chats and see his sincerity and love and concern too when the time comes so I am sure the fact he does not take from me will help us.

Considering this is the bulk of the communication, they will not be able to see and analyze everything. I would imagine their interest is chiefly in preventing terrorism.

With that said I also am aware and prepared to help pay for his Vias and trip and help get his start ina new country....He would do the same for me if vice versa I am sure.....Some here talk about controlling Arabic men. I do not agree that all Arabics are as controlling as stated. Maybe some but not all. I even offered to give my passwords cause he knew one man tries to contact me that was an on-line friend but wished for more even with fact I am marrying, but his answer was no I do not want to control you in that manner and you have private things.....he said he trusts me.

I'll bet real money he's jealous over this. Arabics, huh? Moroccans are not Arabic, they are Berber. I thought you had done research on this, but it is very clear that you are just diving into this with little consideration or thought. Your posts consistently reflect that.

The fact that you would even offer your passwords is not noble, but stupid, Lisa. Your man could use that information against you like nothing else, and I'm certain every account you have stipulates very clearly in the terms and conditions that you are responsible for that information.

I think you are needy, desperate and think that this is your only chance at happiness at your age.

I agree with Nora...you can see how controlling and jealous one is through chats and things that come up talked about and you can learn some characteristics of these men if it is the way you want to be treated in life or not based on your own values and ethics in life/marriage.

If you are desperate, you'll pretty much settle for anything, I guess. Oh well.

and I guess I can be argumenative which I will have to work on cause he is calm and doesn't like worrying with little things of no importance like this board,lol.

If this board is not important, why do you write all these lengthy essays? Is your man starting to bore you or something? I guess I should be flattered at all the attention you give me, Lisa.

and I hate criticism(saying negative things about someone or something) when they degrade the person or the ones posting have no clue of who you really are and what you both stand for and its not been constructive criticism to help..

You have given way more detail than anyone else ever has (especially for not seeing the value of this board) and I do not see anyone degrading you, well, not in the sense you mean. I think its degrading for women to use your relationship to try and justify their own, even if yours may not work out.

.Its to demeanor (behavioral attributes- the way a person behaves toward other people) You can esaily get your point a cross without attacking and ....Luigi and others..

We do all the time. The problem is your definition of "attacking". Like so many others in defensive blogging, Lisa, your idea of this is not agreeing with you or rolling out the red carpet for you and your Muslim partner.

.. there would then be no need to get attacked back.

Trust me, Lisa, the petty bickering of relationship-defense on here hardly qualifies as an attack.

I agree with Lina there is a right and wrong path to get your thoughts across and if you are not 100% sure about a person or astatement maybe not say it.....why plant doubt and bad seeds in people's lives? If their relationship is "DOOMED"or based on falsification it will eventually show...and we will deal with it then.

Have you not read the stories on here? It shows up once you married for a few years, he/she is over here, taking money LEGALLY from your account and then bails with half your assests.

But you do not have to rake Nora and I over the coals and disect everything we say and assume its all lies cause your relationships failed...

1) Nora said she agreed with me 75% of the time

2) The fact that our relationships did not work out is not the logic behind the stance. Those are merely examples. You agreed to marry a man you never met and offered him your passwords and money and trying to sell me on the idea you were not in the least bit enticed to do so. I am now more convinced than ever that this relationship will fail, Lisa.

.If you want to be true friends and really help, wish us the best in our lifes and be a little nicer when you want to interact with us.

I think you really are missing the point of this blog. People are not on here to make new social connections. Most of us have been down that road before, and I for one have been exercising caution ever since.

True friends would stop you from making a major mistake.

True friends would tell you how they really feel and what they really think if you are dating a shady man that you hardly even know even if you try and sell your relationship on-line to total strangers.

True friends would not piggy-back off of your relationship.

Also, Lisa, you are hardly in a position to be telling us about "nice." You're the one who told me you would rather date your 32-old man than me, and your posts are edited for insults, not mine.

I promise we may listen more..

I would hope so

..Don't pretend to know me or him and our relationship when there is no possible way you can.

See, that's the thing. You have already shown and told me more than I need to know along with a lot of information that I did not need to know.

The fact that you even bother to come on here, search for this on-line, rail against me and others (though you have not offered specifics) and this idea that you MUST defend your man is really abnormal, sickening and worrisome.

Aside from all of that, you've told us from your own fingers, Lisa, that you agreed to marry a man before even meeting him. That is bad news no matter who the person is.

The fact that you have a couple of bandwagon supporters like Nora, Lina and Isis does mean anything, especially since their agreeing with you goes against much of what they have said on here previously.

Do you not find that the least bit odd? I mean, Lina said she would never met a man on-line, Isis is being VERY careful about her man even after 4 years and Nora agrees with me 75% of the time.

Or are you so thrilled that a few agree with you that is enough because that is really what you are on here for? Support for something that in your heart of hearts, even you are not sure about?

Do you like destroying people's life when you say you are helping? Your posts reaks of not being friendly and civil.....

Apparently, the mods feel differently. Since you are accusing "us" (whoever that is) of not being "friendly and civil"ie—not agreeing with your "relationship" and pandering to Islam, do feel free to provide evidence instead of ranting about it.

"Don't judge your friends by the way they speak or the way they look, judge them by the way they care for you because CARE is the outcome of TRUE LOVE in Friendship"

Nice quote. Sometimes caring means telling you things you do not want to hear.

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