Shadae is not here to hurt but HELP

Submitted by FARRAH (United States), Dec 28, 2008 at 20:48

Lisa, no one is trying to discourage you. Insh'llah I hope you will be together forever. And you are right because he will not accept one penny from you is a great sign. And truly they don't care if you are overweight. You are also very pretty and blonde, THAT'S what they like.

Anyway, How great it is that the family is so nice & loving...we are simply saying, it has happened to us. That's what they DO!! I think the pain comes more from being deceived by the FAMILY than the man!! Some of us never even MEET the immediate family. Only the male "cousins". And honey, their culture laughs at us like entertainment!! Someone wrote that her Morroccan mate posted a youtube video on how they call us "stupid cows"!

But you are right, NOW, it's not unusual for males over 30 to be single...there are so many of them out of work. No job, no wife. But it is NEVER the norm for them to marry much older woman, divorced, with kids. It seems your man found someone great. So he may not need to use the "tricks" that they are famous for. You scoff at the idea of a second/third wife. If you are not able to give him a son -he will ask you for a divorce or blessings to marry younger woman. That is the number one reason they choose older lady.

Listen, I hope you contribute to this site on how successful your marriage is. But this blog is here for a REASON. There are a lot of other ladies who have some questions on how thrilling this ride is...It's unbelievable, isn't it?? How lovely you are treated, etc.. As I have said before:.Know your rights-You are entitled to a grand , colorful, Morroccan wedding, with beautiful dress from his family. Lot's of food taking place in front of his whole community!! Not in some court in front of police???

But don't stomp on the messenger....until you have asked YOURSELF: Why am I choosing a man 1million miles away, w/no job??? Younger than me. What can he do for ME in MORROCCO?? What is it that HE has , that I want?? Sex, someone fully dependant on you, so that he can't leave?? At least for 2 solid years?? A sorta GUARANTEED companion for a bit?? Or a symbol to PROVE to others that someone DOES want to marry you??

And what about the TYPE of job that he will be able to get at 35years of age in Alabama??? You better hope he wants to work in restaurant/convenience, because that's it. REMINDER :Universities in Morrocco ARE NOT the same level as in USA. You think his family is so sweet so you can bring his son to be lowly worker?? Wake up hon. Hopefully the both of you will work in your business. That is probably a big factor as to why he chose you. They love business owners, homeowners, or nurses for some reason. You stated he had a "girlfriend" before?? These cultures are not allowed to have "girlfriends". He simply could not aquire the $$$$ needed for his bride, so the family called the wedding off. Probably to the extreme shame of his family. So to obtain the US green card is the best revenge he could ever dream of. And they will flaunt it for sure. So, nope your $50 is not needed...YET. He will take the money soon enough. As I said, luv your website. I think you are lucky to find love. But tell us, Why do you find the NEED to advertise here??? Have you seen ONE of us do something like that?? Promoting our mates like the newest NOVELTY item?? Then you put us down for pointing out all of the spots you covered up with photos???

All the best to you dear.

Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".