bluebean

Submitted by Lina (United Kingdom), Dec 29, 2008 at 18:32

Hi there, first of all I'm sure you really like this man. But one of the most important things in Islamic society, is that it's haram (forbidden) to have sexual relations with a possible wife or partner before marriage. Of course there are those who don't follow the rules, but that and several other parts of your story are cause for concern. Secondly, a lot of men find it obscenely easy to tell a girl they love her within days, even hours of meeting her. Love at first sight may occur, but that's rarely the case in these scenarios.

Thirdly, the fact that he lied to you. If he has no problem lying so freely about things like his age and social status, there's a high chance that he will continue to do so in the future. Don't you want a man you can trust?

I'm sure he's a real smooth-talker, almost like a snake charmer, but please try not to fall so hard for him. He could be genuine, but show him that you respect yourself. Seriously, sometimes it's better to wait, and the longer he waits for you the more it will test his feelings for you.

Does he ever talk to you about his religion? It's very unlikely that he would convert from Islam, please try to think of the long-term, although I know that's hard when you're still in that romantic phase of a relationship. There's a chance that he could be a liberal, "modern" Muslim, but the fact that he lied concerns me the most.

Good luck

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