To a muslim woman

Submitted by KarenG (United States), Jan 3, 2009 at 15:08

You said: Although he maybe as you say liberal, once married a lot of people fall back on their traditions of how they were raised, whether here or there that is just nature.

I felt that after a few meetings with my former Algerian boyfriend that he has chosen me and I belonged to him. Period. (My initial posts discuss how I felt I was on a marriage interview.) Yes, he treated me special but was not over the top with compliments. He could be quite lovely and I think he viewed me as having real marriage potential. I am only 5 years older, not out of child-bearing range, but I am going through a divorce so I questioned his motives. But, to the point here, is that I felt he had already placed me in a traditional role, in a sense.

I don't know what muslim marriage is like in Algeria, but when he was with me, I was the center, when he was working or busy, he would contact me. He only talked about things that bothered him, not about daily interactions. There was no inclination for him to introduce me to anyone, but we hadn't dated long and I think most of his friends here in the U.S. (where he is residing temporarily) were not real friends. And besides, why would he introduce me to male friends--oddly, with him, it seemed natural that he would not. I don't know why. Maybe I'm psycho. :) He did once mention that he wished I could move in with him..o_O

Anyway, there is no doubt in my mind that no matter how fond I am of him, our cultures are too far apart. I'm thinking he might not have appreciated that as I did.

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