to sadderbuthopefullywiser

Submitted by Lina (United Kingdom), Feb 1, 2009 at 18:35

Well some do say that the way a man treats his mother is a reflection of how he might treat his lover. A lot of woman-haters or abusers usually had a turbulent relationship with their mother. Get rid of him fast, I know it's easier to say that, but I'm sure there's someone good out there waiting for you & he's wasting your time... he really doesn't sound much different to the boy-like American men that a lot of women complain about. Doesn't matter how gorgeous he is, he appears to have an ugly character, & his behaviour - shouting at his mother, viewing porn, drinking - is not respectable muslim (or general) behaviour. He is probably a social outcast in some way, & is frustrated with his humble upbringing.

I hate to think what kind of a father he'd be if he drinks all night like a teenage boy on spring break. Also, if a woman (or man) spoils a lover, it will usually show up in their behaviour - they will act spoilt & expect to be waited on.

Not all men watch porn... no disrespect to men that do... and that's a typical thing for a guy like that to say: "you're crazy", so that hopefully one day you'll believe it, kind of like indoctrination. "You're crazy, I'M right, & so is everyone else besides you". Don't pay for his ticket, don't waste any more money on him... even if it means he'll work in a fast food restaurant to pay it off lol, he should earn it himself. After all, he's not your child. I'm sure you feel humiliated, but now's time for a fresh start If anyone should feel embarrassed it's him... wow...

He simply seems like an inadequate man, and your interpretation of him seems right. And this kind of scenario happens pretty often: a cute but poor young lover is brought back from his homeland, acts like a big kid in Disneyland, & his trashy attitude starts to shine.

Good luck, I'm sure things will get better

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