Why I post on here

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Feb 5, 2009 at 18:58

Hello again mesmerized

Let me just start off by saying that if you're looking for a healthy relationship and the communication is based on something other than meeting in real life, it complicates things enormously and I support 100%.

The reason why I post on here is because I sort of have found a niche where I can help not just non-Muslim women but people who just want to meet a nice person avoid scandal and heartbreak. For me personally, it's a way for me to generous and share my knowledge, because on this particular subject, not a whole is out there on it and what is out there is not very popular.

The key aspect is that if you've been on here as long as I have is that you'll note that many of the posters are women are in their late 30s, 40s, 50s even 60s. Some of them have been married for over 2 decades but divorced. While they obviously know how to use the internet, I do not think they are aware just how bad it can get on here and deceptive people are. It doesn't mean they are stupid or uneducated, it just means they are not familiar with how bad things can get.

I grew up using the internet. It's to my generation as TV was to the World War II generation and VCRs and disco were to the folks in the 70s. What a lot of people, even people my age do not understand about the internet, is that for the first time in modern history, all the corporations, marketers, the government, law enforcement and even national intelligence agencies are playing catch-up because the technology is moving so quickly, it's unlike anything they have ever experienced and I don't think they really know how to deal with it.

I remember a top television executive saying how they wished they had the same ratings that teenagers and kids in their 20s have on some of their youtube videos.

If the internet has succeeded in one thing, it has turned the power of communication into a whirlwind.

I mean, think about it: You've got terrorists in a tribal area in Afghanistan who at one point were using US government servers in Arkansas for communication and in the realm of competition, you have people under 30 who are running circles around the big wigs who have been sitting atop their skyscrapers and mansions clueless, and everytime they decide to act on something, well, that something is now old and something has come along.

I remember when myspace used to be the place to be, then it was facebook, now youtube. Who knows what tommorrow will bring?

The point I am trying to make is that the internet is a place for information (most of it is garbage; it's at a point now where you pretty much have to pay to get anything decent whether its journal articles or porn), but when you talk about communication on a personal level, then everything changes. In this instance, the internet does not bring people closer together, it only creates the illusion of doing so. We are very social creatures and we need contact with each other. Studies have shown that families that do not cuddle their newborrns are literally risking their lives because they depend so much on that love and attention. The internet takes all physical contact away, but that is really nothing new.

There have well document stories and cases of failed relationships where most of the communication over the phone and by snail mail. Pen pals is what they were sometimes called. So, from where I stand, the internet is just another form of communication to be taken in stride. Basically, its no different from letters or phone conversions except for the frequency of communication. But intensity, that key component that lets you be with someone on an intimate level? That can only happen in person. So many women who post on here are uncertain, and that is where the uncertainty comes from. Try as they may, there is only so much you can learn about someone or say them or recieve from them over the internet. Take that and it also depends more than usual on that person's honesty. So, as you can imagine, the chances for success are already diminishing.

The other key ingredient---I've been doing the on-line, distance dating thing for nearly 8 years. I've talked to women from pretty much all over the world and have been burned, most seriously by an agnostic American that i met on a dating site and later communicated with by phone and myspace. The short story is that she cheated on me the entire time we were together, managed to worm about 5000 euros from me (even though she had twice the income) and used the laptop I gave her to have cybersex with other men, about one guy a week. I had my Zellas, honey UKs, Shadaes, Lees, Yasmines, Hishams, Isises, ect. all telling me to stop this, she is using me. I just did not believe a person was capable of being that selfish. It got to a point where she started having sex with at least one other person while spending my money. Thats what it took for me to finally understand and for one of her parents to talk to me privately about what she was really up to and how she was wasting my money.

After all of that, I felt sorry for myself and could not believe what had happened. When I read some of the stories on here, like what happened to Yasemin and Isis, I realized my story paled in comparson.

That was about four years ago, and I actually just got a call from her credit card company asking for her. Apparently, she still owes them money. Guess some things never change.

The reason why I put some thought on here is because when started being posted in 2006, some were along the lines of "no don't do that".

If you really want to make an impact and help someone, you're going to have explain to them why you think what they are doing is harmful.

I am actually not a Muslim, I am a Catholic. There are Muslim posters on here though, and most of the time we see things the same way.

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