Margarets comment to Rosie

Submitted by Lisa USA (United States), Mar 6, 2009 at 11:16

margaret, the man left his family thousands of miles behind....he loves his family he has lived with for years. Why is it wrong in your eyes he keeps in touch with family while in USA? Im sure Rosie also kept in touch daily as well with her family via the net, but it is wrong for him too? I don't get all this negativity on your part. Ok, you say the wife is last to family, I strongly disagree with you. It is a personal choice and if these men put their family back home FIRST then maybe he is with you for the wrong reasons if he is doing this. I know for example Mohammed and I have discussed this issue so we will not fight over this, yes while in Morocco he has to follow Morocco law and if his mom chose to go to police and say she needed money she has none, Mohammed can be made by law to provide for his mom...but she has money and does not need to do this and given too the mom/sister would have to want to see her son put in jail too if he does not or is not able to pay.....Just because its written in law does not mean it will happen. If the man and his NEW WIFE agrees to send a family member such as mom/sister etc back home a few dollars and you agree, there is nothing wrong with doing so to help a family member who may not be as well of or doing without. Are we not suppose to help our neighbor and family in need? Mohammed is thinking maybe $40 here and there over a few months...You make it sound like they will send their entire paychecks,lol. You can't speak for EVERY INDIVIDUAL MAN what he will or will not do just like you can not say what will happen in Rosie's situation so why be so negative and disrespectful to her and all this culture of men? Another example...all the Mexicans here are famous for sending money back home to family members...does not mean every one of them will.....I know of one Moroccan mom who has not even heard from her son since he has moved to the US and she does not know if he is dead or alive! You make it sound like all these men are BARBARIC,lol....Some have great caring hearts and are hard workers and you as a wife becomes his lifetime partner for the faithful & religious muslims do not accept divorce easily. Given this fact, why would he not love you just as much...You are the one sharing his bed and life, not the mom and sisters back home going on with their lives. It is also in Quran that it is ok to marry a woman of the BOOK meaning a Christian or Jew and a wife is a good thing and it encourages marriage and tries to do all to keep marriages together so why on earth would this man IF HE LOVES YOU not want to put you first? Im beginning to realize most of these marriages fail because the couple does not try hard once the man has come. There seems to be too many jealousies of the family back home and reasons to bicker back and forth....couples not trying to work together or talk about the situations. Of course if this is happening, your marriage is going to fail cause after awhile ANY MAN does not want a wife if all she does is gripe all day or look for too much negative in him to make a good thing work. None of us are PERFECT! It takes two people willing to make it work and this means him too on his part....

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