To Pandora: Advice on relationship, marraige to Turkish man, Turkey Muslim Islam

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Mar 30, 2009 at 17:11

Hi there Pandora!

Wow, it sounds like you have some concerns, and I am glad that you shared them!

Allow me to just say that you have the advantage of seeing this man in person, yet you are not sure.

The reality is, Pandora, anytime you have a quick marriage proposal, something is seriously up. This is a major red flag here, and I defineatly think that the driving motive to be with you is to secure his residency.

As a guy, recently divorced women can attract us like sharks to a bleeding seal. You must understand that while men who are 15 years younger than you will take an interest in you sexually, that does NOT mean it will result in a healthy relationship.

Forget about the fact that he is Turkish for a moment. How many couples do you know where the woman is 15 years older than the man? It rarely happens, Pandora, even if this man were someone from your country, I would still say the same things.

Also, it does bother that he lives with two other women. I guess that's a side note though, because your story is really screaming with red flags.

Pandora, I have no doubt that you are an attractive woman with a lot to offer, but I've seen wayyyy to many of these cases go up in smoke. Even if you do marry him, it can take months or even years before the real him is revealed. For one thing, he may not be a practising Muslim or a very good one, but he might expect you to wear hijab and have no male friends while he goes out for nights on the town and you are stuck at home with the kids.

It can and has happened before.

Pandora, please do not allow this man to have this power over you. I can certainly understand your attraction this man, and I realize that you are probably divorced for a good reason, but don't suffer through this just because he treats you well. In the end, it's never worth it. I promise you there are men from your own country who still know how to treat a woman.

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