Bad news for you

Submitted by Margaret (Poland), May 9, 2009 at 12:56

Hey everybody,

I've stumbled across this site and it is sooooo helpful, and I would appreciate any feedback...

My mom told me we last year were going on a cruise and we would stop in Egypt, so I started to e-mail some Egyptians and find out about the areas. I got along well with one named Mohamed. We talked for 6 months and met (myself, him, my mom) when we came to Egypt in January of this year. Everything was great, he showed me around his city and paid for everything.

In muslim culture it is a total no- go for a girl to email strangers- women dont socialise with men not related to them...

I went back 2 weeks ago to spend a week there and celebrate my birthday with him. I am 23, single, never married, no children, and he is 31, single, never married, no children. We stayed with his sister the first night (in seperate rooms of course) and later met some of his cousins and 2 of his guy friends.

"Sister" is his 99% wife...

We stayed in a flat together which he paid for, and he went home for a few hours every morning (early morning) so his family wouldn't know he was spending the nights with me, which I thought was a great idea.

In the eyes of his family you are "sharmuta" sorry...even if nothing happened and you two just talked...just for prolonged talk to a male grocer you could be labelled "slut" let alone spending night with someone...

He paid for every taxi ride, every train ride, every entrance fee, all food bought at stores, every time we ate out, my cake...everything. The only thing I paid for was credit for his phone because I had to call back home for ridiculous amounts of time. I tried to offer him money and he refused. He finally accepted the 280EP (around $60) after I told him over and over that I have no use for it and I'll lose more money if I change it back to dollars, etc.

Why did you make an offer? Some enticing perhaps ? Sobby stories ?Sick relatives, debts, army, weddings so on ? Or just guilt trips ?

I am trying to recognize any red flags and keep myself protected in this relationship.

31- never married but "sister" is around, you gave him money, weird stories covering his absence (land far away), you lived together in a flat...

But somehow I feel that no matter what I say you will go for it...

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