To his_queen

Submitted by yo_anna (Poland), Jun 29, 2009 at 03:54

Hi. I was going to write a long comment , but i guess Lina has done it for me . I can sign under her post with my both hands, and as a mother at nearly same age as u :) i recommend u to read this comment every day :)

I'd like to add sth from myself , as i experienced 2 relationships with foreigners , and actually now i am flirting online with one egyptian man ( this is why i started to gather info, basically to cool my usually hot head ;))

I realize that feelings are extremely powerful force, and u might get involved with him , the more that he seems to be so sincere till now . But are u sure that u will be able to live with a thought that he has done it not only for u , but also for visa ? Would u engage knowing that this fairy tale may last some years , and once he becomes well rooted in ur country , we might leave u ? U know , i faced such a question once , and i did it . As i expected , this relation didn't survive , and i was the one who broke it , but i am happy i was with this man. We had wonderfull moments , and we still keep friendship.

Just everything u do , be sure 100% that this is really what u want ,be ready for all consequesnces , even bad ones, and , what's most important , keep your head cool and always have ready plan B or even C.

Besides ... have u ever had virtual affair before , and had a chance to meet this person in reality ???
Think well , and see how much the feeling that we create in internet differes from the one in reality . If u ever think serious abt this man, before u commit, i'd suggest that u meet him asap.

Couple of words abt myself : I am from central Europe :) women here started to face all those fake behaviours from egyptians , tunisians, turskish etc. once we joined EU . There are many discussions, questions , even sites with photos of scammers , including their names and place of work . There are many bad stories, but there are also good stories of women married to muslim , who live a good life.

My long term relations both were with foreigners, one with greek, one with turkish . Both of them failed , but not because of any scam , but rather due to personal characters and different expectations. We can never be sure, whoever we love , egyptian , canadian or french. The point is to be a smart woman, to build self-confidence despite bad experiences from man , to fight for our self- esteem. Then we can protect ourselves, trust our intuition. Then ... scammers have no chance , cos we won't let them manipulate us.

With best regards to whole community of this blog , it;s real pleasure to read here , cos those advice are very useful not only regarding to muslims , but to relations in general .
Joan

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