Response to Vivi

Submitted by Amber Rose (Philippines), Aug 5, 2009 at 23:27

Dear Vivi,

He touched my heart with a thousand pleasures and broke it into million pieces. Indeed, it takes a lifetime to forget … I read this quote from a book.

It must have been an agonizing battle between your heart and your mind. Up to the last time, you still wonder, even hoping if he really loves you. You have this trivial question because you love him dearly and it's hard to grasp that he may not feel the same for you. But how could you just forget when he in returned dedicated so much time and effort to chat with you? How could he spend 1 yr of his life professing love if those were just lies? It's just tormenting to realize and accept.

As for me, I saw his dedication to make our relationship work, even spending his lunch break talking to me. Looking back, it's kind of impossible that he is just using me. But our story is very similar… I am starting to feel worried. Wow, 1 year! Pretty long time huh? Ours is new, started January of this year, but I felt like I've known him forever. Never felt something like this in my life. Well, there are gorgeous Filipino men out here but there is no connection whatsoever. I guess it's his uniqueness that attracted me to him.

About your question if he really loves you? I would say NO… Base on my research good Muslim men would never demand money from a woman, more so to a woman he genuinely loves - that is their culture. The mere fact that he doesn't care if you'll think negatively of him is a red flag. If he loves you truly, he will give assurance that once you got married he's capable of providing you with a stable life. It's their nature to project themselves as good providers; otherwise they will be discriminated in their society. Men should be the head of the household and it would be a shame to get support from a woman. But he accepted your offer just the same. So it means he's not serious after all. But your man is a Christian. Well, he still should not be asking you for money. As a man, this is unacceptable! It's great that you tested him and discovered his true colors.

Uhmm... You're so brave to walk away … I applaud you for this. You're smart on determining whether his real or fake. Sometimes, love could make us irrational. Good thing, you used your head before he damaged your total being… I am proud of you Vivi… By the way, how long have you been working in Japan as a nurse? How's your life over there? My Egyptian man is also from Alexandria. His name is Mohamed Ahmed. He's very handsome and masculine. He will turn 25 this month.

I still have a long way to go… About my Egyptian man, well he's consistent as of to date. He still doesn't come up with excuses and sad stories about his family. Let's see. Pray for me. I just love him so much… But like you, I know I am a strong woman and I could away when needed. Maraming, maraming salamat sa'yo!

Love,

Amber Rose

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