Repsonse to Lina---Corrections, ect.

Submitted by Straight_Talk_Luigi (United States), Oct 29, 2009 at 02:04

Woahhh, first of all I'd like to challenge your sweeping generalization that I'm "naive".

That's not a sweeping generalization.

Basically, just because I'm young and pretty I must be "susceptible and naive". Way to judge someone for their looks.

No, it's because one minute you post that you think Lisa USA's relationship is real, and then on the same day, you write about how bad on-line dating is.

It was rather obvious to me that

a) Lisa's long essays with little supporting evidence

and

b) Her sharing of her myspace pictures

Is what made you think she is the exception to all of those supposed on-line dating principles you keep discussing on here.

If anything men are intimidated by me, they look but they don't touch lol. You really think that you can look at someone's face and say "oh she's fair game". I may be open-minded in a lot of ways but I'm definitely not naive. It's not a great idea judging someone's personality through the internet.

I'm not intimidated by you, but I would never touch a girl unless I had her permission first or unless she touched me first. I think a lot of guys over there are too shy to approach you because they are scared of women in general and/or just don't know how to proceed. No one is judging you, Lina, and I was not evaluating your personality, just what you said.

What I wrote to Lisa is my business and my opinion... everyone is allowed one, even if they go against what everyone else is saying on here. Surely it's a good thing that Lisa wasn't fishing for a Moroccan man, because those are usually the ones that end in tears.

Statistics gathered from social research don't mean a thing in the real world.

Oh, I've seen these kinds of statements before. Usually, they come from people trying to justify something personal and or selfish, or they are on the last whims of argument they know they cannot win.

Yes, Lina, they do. Statistics are a proven scientific measure. That's why they are gathered and used, including by on this blog. In many ways, numerical relationships tell us how the world works. Perhaps some collegiate education would be useful to you after all.

I'll say "lol" as much as I like... lol

Well, you're the one who wants people to think of you as mature and serious on here, and if I were in the place of asking advice, I know I would not take someone who "LOLs" like this is a teenage MSN conversation seriously.

A lot of Moroccan men do want an easy way out of the country. A lot of them are dating foreigners, but not just for that reason... a lot of them do so because they are sick of some of their own snooty women who want the good life, rather than someone like Lisa who is prepared to be a loving wife.

Oh, I have doubt about Lisa's noble intentions. It's her husband that concerns me.

Times are changing...

Most Moroccans are marrying Moroccans.

Moroccan women are becoming more modern and the men want someone less materialistic. Mixed marriages are common in the West, if anything Berbers from the mountains are the ones who don't like mixing.

Mixed marriages are still very much a minority in the West. Any country's census will tell you that. They also are in Morocco.

Of course I don't know Simo's true intentions; and neither do you for that matter. The only personal who knows what Simo's intentions are is Simo.

That is not sufficient reason to not offer advice. Lisa has provided enough information for me. No one can say the chance that this will fail is 100%, but that is the case for everyone on here. Why take the risk with so much at stake? That's why we have those red flags as a guide.

No, I don't use dating sites... that's my preference. But you can't assume that everyone who does is up to no good.

I have not assumed that. Not everyone who uses dating sites talk about their relationship on-line either. It works okay to meet people in a more local setting, but a lot of people find themselves going vast distances to find someone. In a lot cases, they look for someone from a different culture or country just for the sake of being different. That is unfortunate, and rarely leads to happiness.

People use the internet for different purposes.

That is an insufficient explanation for the purpose of this blog.

Most of the internet is garbage. If you want anything of quality whether it's research or porn, you have to pay for it. Dinking around on-line all the time in the middle of night is hardly a quality activity. Those who often are up to no good or have some sort of social-related behaviour or mental problem.

Simo was mentioned on here by other women? The same Simo or...? Because Simo is a pretty common nickname in Morocco.

Yes, Lina, the name Simo has been mentioned on here before, and as I recall, Lisa did take notice.

From what I gather, Lisa and Simo married in real life - their rings weren't exchanged via email. And the ceremony wasn't hidden from public view.

I have never known any marriage to occur by exchaning rings via mail. I don't think it is possible either from a legal standpoint. So, that argument really does not help Lisa out.

Most good Moroccan men will marry Moroccan women? Mmm, if their women are so decent, why are so many of them prostituting themselves out to Gulf Arabs or anyone who will offer them a Gucci handbag?

Lina, prostitution and sex exist pretty much in every country except for the Vatican.

And why are their men allowing it?

Money, I suppose.

Actually, it wasn't just along the Med beaches that I saw scantily-clad women, but from the ghettos of Casablanca to the villages of Marrakesh (southerners don't wear headscarves and have more power in choosing a partner). Moroccan women are not all wallflowers... they shout at men, drive cars and go out with their boyfriends in skimpy clothes that would make an Egyptian man blush.

Oh, believe me, I know.

Some of them even tried to hit on my father. I found it funny I guess, because female tourists are always told to dress "modestly", but really most tourists are dressed more decently than them.

Yeah, I know of a couple of Moroccans who dress very liberally.

What man DOES stick up for his woman online? Most men of all cultures are not the type to write long essays about their relationship on a blog.

Oh, believe me, this ethnic and relationship pandering is a two way street, but with men you'll find them to be more along the lines of total jerks or just whiny and insecure.

And really, anyone who has to talk about their relationships on-line---it means there is something wrong.

As for Moroccan men wanting to brag, well like you said a lot of them are caucasian and their own women can be beautiful, so why would they go so far as to brag about banging a western woman?

Lina: bragging about sex is a guy thing. Not every guy does it, but I can assure you, it's a favorite male pastime. I really cannot expect you to fully understand that.

Some of them don't even like the western look.

Again, which is another reason why they marry Moroccan women.

I don't think too many women on here fish for Moroccan men, a lot times they find the women. That's the typical nature of these on-line or vacation encounters....the man makes the first move. See, the greatest fear that women have in the West---aside from rape and murder---is looking like a slut.

On a side note, I couldn't care less what Istanbulchick thinks about my father or myself... what bothers me is her spiteful, ignorant remarks aimed at women who are already going through rough times. The posts on this blog are just too one-sided, paranoid and negative... I see no changes here, just the same remarks of "stay away from Muslim men, move on" etc. Come on... they're to the point, but you have to dig deeper than that.

Then Lina, I suggest you take that up with the authors of said posts. As for myself, I have said repeatedly (as has Hisham Zein) that not all Muslim, Moroccan or whatever men are bad, but neither are all Western or Christian men. I'm really getting sick and tired of people telling me specifically that not all X and X are bad. I try to avoid saying it because

a) Women in relationships with Middle Eastern men will just use that as an excuse to continue the relationship, even if it's clearly a scam.

b) The real reason why most Western women are on here is because they've been treated poorly by Western men who are selfish and care only for themselves and they are looking for true love elsewhere.

c) Most people on here who do say that are very emotionally charged and don't seem to mean it in their heart of hearts.

And I think what bothers you is Lisa's transformation from an all-American Christian girl to a Muslim... isn't that like a big thing in Catholicism?

The question I always ask about people changing faiths in a relationship: Is it genuine, or just because it's what your partner wants.

If it helps, Lina, yes, it is wrong for a Christian to change religions, but my advice and responses to Lisa on her relationship would still be similar.

It is not Islam that is behind this.

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