A TRUE STORY OF MARRYING A MOROCCAN

Submitted by ANONYMOUSXXXXXX (United States), Jan 2, 2010 at 20:11

Hello to all. Just let me say I really loved the comments by noonesbusiness. I just wanted to update and tell you folks a true story of being married to a Moroccan man. I will try to stick to facts.

Yes, there is a huge age difference, BUT I am not sure this is the greatest problem. I truly believe he loves me. The bad news???? They are not able to love American women the way we expect. You see, at home they are taken care of like little babies. Even though my husband lived away from home since he was a teen, at home his mom and sisters still take care of him. But I saw the last time we were there, he treats his mom like crap, yelling and screaming. I was quite shocked and told him she should have slapped his face. He does not treat his dad that way. By the way, I know his family loves me genuinely. They treat me like a queen and are very nice people. They have given me presents that I know have been very expensive. His sisters are the most wonderful in the world.

The problem is not his family, it is HIM. First, he doesn't want kids, so that is not an issue. The issues? He wants to be babied, BUT he wants to complain if you ask too much of him. He works, but resents having to give me money for bills, for which I pay most of my paycheck. He doesn't understand saving for future health issues. It's more live for the day.

He resents that I have saved, even though I explain to him that I have worked more than 40 years to save money. He is an angry person missing a compassion gene. Did I see this before? No, he was very careful not to lose his temper in front of me before he came over and we married. So, you can imagine my shock when he got mad and threw stuff--yes, like a little teenage boy!!! My brother had to get in his face and threaten him if he ever struck me. So he has been able to control that. Sounds like a bully, right? Trying to control people with ignoring them when it suits him. It's like fighting with a person who only hears his own truths.

I am a teacher of many years with 6 years of college, so I am not stupid. I looked at it like--ok, we will see how it goes. But now I feel responsible for him in some strange way. He will have his permanent green card within maybe 6 months, so I think then I will see how it goes. I have gone to a divorce lawyer, who says I can put him out, but may have to give him money. And this is a poor man who came with nothing!! He works, but by my standards is lazy, preferring to lay around in bed while I work in the yard, etc. He does give me some money each week for bills. I insist that he does work and pay for some things. He doesn't like it, but tough crap for him!! He is jealous of several of his friends whose wives didn't make them work the first year they were here. I say, so go find one of them to marry...lol

I do have one friend whose husband is a nice easygoing guy, but he will have nothing to do with other Moroccans. So make your own judgments there.

My hubby has met other Moroccan men nearby and now they go to a coffee shop and talk. They stay out til like 5 am at each other's houses. Ok with me cuz it is peaceful and quiet then. They talk loud, and fight often. They listen to loud tv and music. I crave the quiet.

I would say I have been happy maybe 25% of our married life. My friends think I am crazy for putting up with his crap.Sometimes I think so too. One day, I will probably file those divorce papers. The main thing that drives me crazy about him (well, one of the main ones)? He thinks like most Moroccan men that he should open a business, no doubt with my money. That seems to be their goal. I think they think then somebody else can do the work while they sit back. If you want affection, attention, and loving gestures, don't marry them. That is not in their culture. They are basically selfish and only care about themselves. More later...

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