A Kindred Wish

Submitted by Stephanie (United States), Jan 13, 2010 at 11:13

This is not really a response or rather an observation. Women, the ones that come on this site for answers, for calmness of nerves, just ask yourself, does he give you the same consideration, as you give him? Does he cherish you, put you first above others, treat you like he is your world. If you were desolate, would he financially help you out, if you asked for money? Would he always be there in your time of need? If you find a no to any of these answers then the man is not right for you. We all know love can not hurt or cause pain, not real love. Real love is not selfish and does not look for it's own interests. I know it's Biblical but it's true. We all know it's true because you can see inside yourself and know you never thought of yourself when worried for him. Imagine the pain a lot of these women have gone through and yet many probably suffered for months or even years before wishing that what they felt and saw just wasn't true. To ignore it, shows weakness. I am sorry if that is offensive. Deep down we don't want to admit that we could be in a one sided relationship or in simple terms, just be used. It hurts too much and we want to believe in the "happily ever afters." At least for ourselves. Sometimes it takes a while to find our destiny.

I feel sad that some people come on here just irrate and so upset because they just can't believe what has happened to them is true, when deep down, they probably knew for a long time. There are signs, these men put you in your place, tell you, you are being disrespectful, selfish, out of line when you express yourself, they are excessively jealous and yet they don't want to deal with you when you cry or if you might be jealous. You haven't the right to be jealous when it comes to them. They belittle you, withdrawal from you for weeks when you do finally reach a breaking point and try to stand up for yourself, because they are not attached to you, it is easy for them to do so. They haven't invested their emotions like you.

Yeah, these men are scoundrels and they deserve some repercussions but we all know we won't determine what ever happens to them. I truly believe everyone gets what they deserve in the end and if you have in anyway helped one of these men, call them charity. You gave immensely to charity. So you must grow from it and know he just isn't worth the sadness that you are feeling. Do you think he sits every day of the week when he doesn't talk with you, trying to figure out whom you are with, searching for you online, etc...No....no. He knows he has you wrapped around his little finger and when he finally wants you, you will be there.

Yet the real truth thing here is, you women should have enough confidence in yourself and self esteem, as to not let any man treat you bad like this. You should recognize that no one really cares for you when they can hurt you, as these men do. You are worth way more, and your kindness is to be commended my Dears but for God Sakes, never feel so bleak or weak for these men. They don't feel the same so imagine all your senseless feelings. Get upset, get strong, and grow as a woman. You are beautiful women, with beautiful hearts and I am so sorry each one of you ever had to suffer.

Note: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the authors alone and not necessarily those of Daniel Pipes. Original writing only, please. Comments are screened and in some cases edited before posting. Reasoned disagreement is welcome but not comments that are scurrilous, off-topic, commercial, disparaging religions, or otherwise inappropriate. For complete regulations, see the "Guidelines for Reader Comments".