To Zella

Submitted by New (United States), Jan 30, 2010 at 01:03

The comment you made sounds prettey much like my husband's plans when he gets here. He is talking school to better his English (which it is not that bad now), and opening a resturant next. He is working hard now in his country to save money. Will you read my story and tell me what you think he may have in mind with me.

I have been following this site for some time now. It may be a little too late for me but I will tell my story anyway.

One person on here said it so true fully; no one will entertain themselves with this site unless something is wrong in their relationship. I met someone from the Middle East 2 years ago online. We kept in touch and I went to married him so we could be together. We didn't want to spend a lot of money going back and forward to his country for years and I feel you never really know anyone anyway until you live with them. However, I went there at my own expense because I wanted to meet him. I did not decide to marrying him until after I got to his country (even though we talked about it). Everything clicked and we had a good time so I went ahead with the marriage.

We both are over 40 and I am 5 years older. He is divorced and I never been married. I have lived with a man for 14 years but never married. The last few years I have been devoted to God and my church. I consider myself a nice-looking black American, not obese, a parole officer with my state government, have several cars, own my home and rental property (none of this have I told him). He doesn't ask me for money. I only helped pay for an attorney to help start the immigration process only because the fee changed during the time he sent the money to me, it wasn't very much. If he is using me for anything, it will be for a visa. He owns his own taxi, in which he is in the process of selling the car, taxi license and all to come here (so he say). He lives fairly well in his country. I feel that he just want to try something else, for he is use to living in other countries before his 6 year marriage to his cousin. They had 2 kids, which he said he will get them if she re-marry.

The marriage went bad after his mother died, for she was the one who arranged the it, and kept it together while she was alive. The marriage was not working out too well, but he stayed married to her because of his mother. He was divorced when I met him. I spent time with his sister and have talked to 2 of his brothers over the phone. They lives in other countries. I know its said that when they mention a sister, they maybe talking about a wife, but she really is his sister for they look alike and she is 2 years older than me. Her husband works in Kuwait where she will join him when their daughter who is attending Law School graduates. All of his siblings live in different countries. His youngest brother came home from Italy to marry a girl from their country recently. He got engaged but back out at the last minute. He is in love with a girl from Sweden and cannot bring himself to leave her (they live together in Italy).

When my husband asked to marry me, VISA was the first thing that come to my mind. That is what everyone thinks when a man or female from another country want to marry us. But when I think about how he has brothers in other counties and they all have businesses and help each other all the time. They helped him buy a new taxi 6 months ago. It also came to mind that if he wants to leave his country why doesn't he go where they are, instead of coming here with me. I thought with the type of job that I have would frighten him away if he is scamming me. I do surveillance work. Train and work with police officers anually. I'm friends with lots of detectives, lawyers and judges and thought he would think twice about scamming me. Tell me what you think of my story.

I secured all my property and investments before I married him, even though he seems to be doing ok for himselfm I done it anyway. I love a lot of things about him and I believe he does the same for me. I want to be with him forever but I don't think I would be devastated if our marriage does not last very long.

Do you think I have anything to worried about? We are at the end of our immigration process and just finished a second interview and waiting the answer. I have notice in their country that it is normal for a man to live abroad to work and the wives are home with the kids. His sister see her husband every 3 months, but he sends the money to her. She and her kids are taken care of very well. When I see the arrangements between her and her husband, I wonder if my husband will take his wife back before he comes here and do the same with me. After reading this site, all kind of thoughts have entered my mind.

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