is it the same in Jordan..., Carol

Submitted by Diane (United States), Feb 15, 2010 at 02:44

I was reading your reply. It sounds like what my friends are saying to me about my marriage request from a young Jordanian.

It was two years of off and on internet email and chat when F got serious to ask me to marry him. He told me that he was honestly looking for a marriage not for fun. I kept wondering about this age thing which he says is a number. When I read your words...'stupid westerner" .... I felt in many ways that is what happen to me.

I bought a ticket to go meet him. I did the "sleepless in seattle" movie thing where I just had to see for myself the man that was saying those word and phone calls to me. I made my own hotel reservations for the first few days because I wasn't sure about the reality. He spent the first night with me after we had drinks and dinner with his brother and friend. The next day, he left to get an apartment near his family for me to stay instead of the hotel in Amman. I ventured out on my own for a walk and lunch. I lived and traveled in Italy.

His message text to me ..." am keep thinking what we are doing is wrong"..... which he meant later it was his situation. He was unemployed and felt sad and shy about me coming. I stayed alone that night and in the morning, I made arrangments to go site seeing and then the bus station. He did not scold me for doing this however other muslim men asked me alot of questions when I did this. His family was warm welcome and we did lots of things together. His father, sister and F took me to see Jerash and Aljourn. We spent most meals with his mother cooking. She doesn't speak english. The brothers and sister would translate. I don't really know what he introduce me as ... "future wife" ...or what. This is now what my American friend living in Jordan tells me. ......

I am like 50% of believe how they treat us so well and do this in front of our face and talk behind our backs. Where does it in the Koran..... to do this? Moses did send down the 10 commandments. I keep thinking.

Well, I left after 8 days of being there with the thought of coming back to spend 3 weeks in the culture to see if there would be a serious move to Jordan. I am alot older then him 56 --30 even though no one believes my age. Age is a number is what I get from others. He is mature, intelligent...... .

After I left, F went to debtor's prison. I corresponded constantly with his brother FD. In the past few months, I only have gotten 2 emails...from F. Last one is Dec 5th. I got a text on Feb 7 to ask me to be online. F never came online. .........

Part of me just wants to fly over like I was planning and look him in the eyes to see what he really was saying to me ..... as they probably are laughing as you wrote. I don't think his parents know what really is the truth. I think it is a circle of friends that got him to do this because of his situation. Part of me thinks he is feeling guilty. .... I want to really investigate about his jail back ground because it does make sense. He wants to get get a place, job back and have me as his wife. If it is true about his background, he can't get a visa to leave the country. He has constantly asked me by thoughts that I would live here and what would my family say.......

I am tired and not writing complete sentences. 50/50 tell me just tell me to stop all contact with family even though they write me once in awhile on internet. .....

Please lets see what you other have to say....

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