This is not stereo typing..it's warning people to be careful...

Submitted by My Opinion (United States), Nov 14, 2011 at 22:01

I must say I went into a relationship five years ago believing all people were the same and the religion didn't necessarily form the person. We know the religion is not the person but the fact is, a lot of people come from third world countries to the USA, Canada and Europe to find their way without any care for whom they may hurt on the way A lot of green card seekers tend to careless about the person they woo simply with only one motive: to make a better life for themselves and their family at any cost. Perhaps some Muslim people may not be so different than Americans, Europeans or Canadians but the truth is, we are very different. We are raised differently and taught differently. There are huge differences and those differences are hard to bridge. Oddly, most Muslim stereo type western women and western society so please don't be upset because many western women have had terrible experiences with Middle Eastern men and are voicing their experiences. The reason why there are warnings out there is because so many of those men that come from Middle Eastern countries abuse these western women.

Fortunately I saw the light quickly. The Muslim man I knew played on my weakness and acted like he would treat me like a queen. He knew I was married, I was separated, but tried to wreck my marriage and take me from my children by reasoning that in the Quran people left their families, children, brothers and sisters when they converted. I realized that any person like this, that would recommend you to leave your children couldn't be a good person and so I told him I didn't want to have anything to do with him. He acted like he wanted only me and came to the USA trying to convince me to marry him. I refused and out of desperation he made a quickie marriage to some lonely, very large woman that he didn't know just to get a green card. Through out the last four years he supposedly had no money and tried to give the ole' guilt trip of how he ruined his life for his love coming here to this f** country. I found out he sullied my name and said terrible things about me, saying I was a bad mother, that I deserted him and left him to fend for himself alone after he chased after me begging and pushing me to marry him, just so people would feel sorry for him and give him money. I personally chose not to have anything to do with him and told him that my children came first but I was never unkind to him. I paid for hotels and plane tickets until he could get his life in order and yet I became this terrible person to everyone that he met later on simply because I chose not to marry him. The thing is, the woman he did marry, whom he is still married to, was just a convenience and not for love. The poor woman is now heart sick over him, will do just about anything for him because she was lonely and wanting love. He has always refused to ever live with her, choosing to live a few hundred miles away in a complete other city so he can be free to do as he pleases. He keeps her always wanting and wondering, accasionally visiting her when she is about to give up and becomes desperate. Then he resorts to sleeping with her to keep her on track, telling her what she wishes to hear and then leaving again. You see he has had many girlfriends and uses them all for sex, money and anything he can get. Some women obviously can be very stupid. To this day, he is still married to the one woman, living 200 miles away and making house with another. He now has a baby by another woman that he married in a mosque. By the way, this woman was already married legally to another man:) Ah the irony. The other woman he married for the green card never knew until after it all happened. You think ask her for permission...heck no. He tells the woman that he is legally married to what she wishes to hear and lies because he reasons it's okay to lie to save feelings and protect himself. Another teaching that Christians don't agree on. We don't feel it's right to lie under any circumstance especially in life situations such as these. He tells the woman that has the baby with what she wants to hear and then he has his relations with another fifty year old for computers and money and other things This is the first Egyptian man I knew. He was my first eye opener to the Egyptian ways. Fortunately I walked away before I got too carried away and had made no ties or promises:) but I can almost assure you that all the other women in his life here in the states are not so fortunate. They are for his convenience, for temporary use until he gets his permanent green card and feels secure enough to drag his Egyptian life over. Belief me he is telling each and everyone one of those women that they are his love and everything they want to hear. How do I know all this? Because I've met the woman who he got pregnant and other than being very gullible, she is very nice. He was trying to get with me while he was with her and she read and heard his texts and messages to me. She told me he abused her, beat her, treated her terrible and I suppose these women allow it because they feel they can't get anything better. If you are one of these women, please don't think you have to settle for something like that. You are better than that. Don't waste your life in hopes that your relationship may be different than all the rest If you have fears or doubts then something is terribly wrong. Heed the warnings in your head and get yourself into a situation you feel you can trust. Some signs are, they are wonderful and loving at first, but they break you down with words by belittling you later after you trust. Most give the silent treatment, sometimes not talking with you for weeks. They say they won't take money from a woman at first but later, break down and take it and they don't necessarily ask for it right up front either. The person I knew, if you offered, at first he'd say no, then later ask if you still had that old computer, phone or whatever and decide he could use it if you weren't needing it...ummm He was very sly about the way he approach that subject and believe me, most would never take money from a Muslim born back home but western non-Muslims women, by all accounts I've heard while talking with Muslim friends and even with Muslim men say this. Most Muslim men never consider even a woman that converts as a true Muslim like their home grown girls. With this reasoning, it's okay to take money from you even if you feel you converted. He still won't feel you are a true Muslim in most cases. Just because you wish for a relationship and don't want to be lonely, it isn't worth most of what these women go through. He seeks out women that have troubled marriages, are weak, are lonely and looking for a shoulder to cry on. At first he is kind and gentle then he changes to being mean and giving you the silent treatment. Heed the signs! The woman he got pregnant, she had a few kids already, was married to another man when he married her in the mosque. What kind of Mulsim is this? Even though she knows he cheated on her, she hopes someday she will have what she desires most, he desires most. It's all bull*. People please, it shouldn't take a relationship miles away to make you happy. There are proven statistics that show such relationships are more prone to failing. Talking on the internet and over the phone hides and masks many details. You don't know the man until you've been with him. There are many Muslim couples here that I know, most have lived here for 20 years, but they are very nice people so I am not talking down Muslim people. There are many, many nice people from all over. The thing is, many third world countries are going through very hard times right now and it is very difficult for them to make money or to get jobs. Many will do just about anything, no matter what it takes or who it hurts to get what they want. Five years of going through short term distress in a loveless marriage is nothing when you see the bigger picture. Understand and don't be hurt if you are just another statistic. Many people have warned you and once it happens to you, you may be ashamed and sad but if you are a statistic, warn others so they won't make the same mistake. After all, we are human, we make mistakes. You take a chance in any relationship but more so with this kind. It's sad to think ...you will have to wait for several years, until after his green card comes through to see if your relationship with him and his love for you is for real.

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