No want to be harsh but...

Submitted by Dayse (United States), Oct 28, 2014 at 15:17

I'm a Muslim converted female. I live in US, I'm over 30, divorced and have a child...why Im saying this? Because one thing a lot of non-Muslims females lacks to know, MUSLIM MEN DO NOT LIKE NON-VIRGIN WOMEN, even if she was legit married before. Also Muslim man majority don't like to marry outside of their culture and definitely females older than them is a BIG NO.

As a Muslimah, is hard for me to find a spouse in US, because simply a man that already has his paperwork, they no longer need a sponsor and they can be picky, even if those men already divorced and have kids, RARELY goes to a "western" female with kids or previously married, when they can go back home and marry a virgin girl there, and bring here or just keep her back in home country and go "vacation"a few times a year in her house.

Always ,ALWAYS be suspicious if a cutie young guy from half-way across of the globe falls in love with you, specially in a speed of a blink of an eye. Please just use common sense. if a guy is a Muslim living in a Muslim country, surrounded by Muslim females left and right, range from all religious practices from over religious to liberal, same culture, same language, why a guy would be seeking outside of his country for? Why he would seek love across the ocean when he can get it at home? Exactly because my dear sweet dear fellow women he wants something from you, and most is not MONEY, is actually something worse HE WANTS VISA, He wants YOU to bring him here, he wants YOU to pay for the paperwork, marriage, air tickets, etc, he wants you to maintain him when he comes here and builds his "American Dream" that he doesn't have no one last bit of intention to share with you, because simply in their minds you are a western women. You are bellow him, you are not worth marriage, regardless if you and him share the same faith. Those man are cunning, and smart, usually they target the women that are more lonely, the over 30's divorced/widow females, the single moms, etc., because being a single mom does not always leave space in your life to date or find love, working or study or both, care for the kids and house chores.

And it is not just the Arabic/Middle Eastern ones, now a days it seems there is the South Asia invasion of Facebook, whats app, vibber, etc. Dont be foolish. Also with the ones who look the sweet pious,righteous man, who tells you all about Islam and how the man should lower his gaze to a woman, and how he wants to marry a Christian or try to convert you, how he tells the story of the Prophet Muhhamed (SAW) who married the old and poor women ( which is actually truth) and how Islam teaches a guy to prefer to be married to a woman with kids or in need( which is also true), but he fails to apply the same rule on the poor old in need women in HIS COUNTRY.

His good intentions are only towards the women outside of his country, nor the indigent and in real need women in his country. Dont be fooled when they get "offended" to the smallest implication that they are seeking Visa, and how they tell you to come and live in his country, because what they are actually saying is you come and live here, until I will keep pestering you to move to your country.

Don't fool yourself. When a Muslim man seriously wants to marry to build a family ,he doesn't go to Facebook, whats up, etc. He will use traditional ways, he will ask his family to find him a bride or an Imam, or a matchmaker , who will do a trough triagem in the woman's family background. A serious Muslim man, doesn't go around adding female friends because talking to women all over the place with no intention of marriage it is not recommended in Islam. Also they see how the women are in their home country, are they wearing short skirts, t-shirts, etc? Do they have male friends? Those men will not see a woman that talks to lots of man on internet or have male friends as a good female, they will just see this as an excuse to use you and divorce you later.

So even I, as a Muslimah, I do not advise a western women to fall for any virtual Prince Aladin and to keep their love interested in the same country, preferably someone with their own paperwork. No matter if he is black, white, yellow or purple, of any faith, any country. It will be less headache and heartbreak.

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