Sorry to hear this Robin!

Submitted by Becca, May 22, 2019 at 05:39

Hey Robin!

Where do I begin... I'm sorry that this happened to you! With these people, they are raised very differently to Western people. We do not have any qualities that are similar to them which makes us very susceptible to manipulation, being used and abused and just simply not being treated with respect and dignity. What you also need to remember Robin is that these men do these exact same things to their own women behind closed doors but because of their socialisation, they have already accepted that this will be a reality once they get married to one of them it like some twisted normalised reality for them! I know this because I have a few Muslim friends who have told me such awful stories, one has actually ran away from her husband because she couldn't stand for the abuse. Another one fled from her family in France because they were going to send her back to Algeria to marry her own cousin! I think the Western world helped to open both of these women's eyes and helped them to truly see that there's a better life for them here. With them, abuse comes in many forms: emotional, physical and verbal but a lot of it is done in an indirect way so if you've never encountered one of these men before it becomes quite difficult to tell when it is happening! Another thing I have noticed about these men is that they all feel very entitled to everything that they gain from western people which should most definitely NOT be the case. I always ask myself this: "if Moroccan men living in western society are not in marriages with western women, why do the ones in Morocco do/ consider it?" I will continue to ask myself this because when you walk around with any type of question in your head, you begin to look for the answers and that's when observation comes into play- It's a very good tactic! I always question everything because I don't like be spoon fed even in university because thinking for yourself never comes how it used to so I have to push even harder for my answers.

Anyway, Robin this is NOT your fault, you are NOTHING of the sort that he told you you are, from you're response to me I can tell that you are very intelligent and articulate but unfortunately, these things can creep up on the best of people! Everything happens for a reason and in this case, things worked out for the very best! Work on yourself, begin to love yourself again, try to figure what you like/love doing and do that, socialise with your friends and do things that you've always wanted to do! Someone is out there waiting for you and much better days will come for you Robin trust me. The position you're in, could have been a trigger for that guy which may have bought about envy and resentment! Just remember that you are better than him, you are kinder than him and you are most definitely more beautiful than him both inside and out! True beauty resides in the heart, so when you're ready look for someone that proves to feed your heart and soul with happiness, respect and love!

As a side note, I would like to say that I have always been so disgusted by this reality but these them are supposed to be Muslim, Islam is supposed to be a religion of peace but a lot of its people do not reflect this in any way shape, or form! If you're not religious already I would strongly recommend reading the bible because I'm telling you like I tell all of my friends, Jesus loves you and has a plan for you when you turn to him he changes your life for the better!

Anyway stay safe, look after yourself, take on some things that I have told you and transform yourself into a better and more beautiful you! Take care Robin.

Becca :)

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