We have to ask ourselves what he is really romancing

Submitted by Chelsea (United States), Oct 30, 2019 at 14:40

Excellent response NT.

We have to ask ourselves some questions, especially this big one no matter what stage we are in during this "relationship". WHAT IS HE REALLY ROMANCING??

ROMANCING THE GREEN CARD was what was happening with mine. My value was only that. It is hard to face the ugly truth about such things but necessary to save us from hurt.

Mine had told me he never wanted USA...but that was a BIG LIE once we were full blown into this thing. He would say things like he did not want USA to think he was a BAD MAN so he would have to protect me while I was there. Wait just a minute....I started thinking....shouldn't he protect me just because he loved me? To heck with what others thought. Also I had heard all that I don't want USA so long...one day I asked him if he had applied for the lottery. He said YES......BINGO!! Truth. The ugly truth will come to the surface at some point. He was not even smart enough to realize that he contradicted himself so much.

He started to have slippage of the tongue and I was able to discern his real intentions just by listening to him.

My only value was that I was a walking green card for him. When I was there with him, he was not telling me all the lovebombing lies. It started back only after I returned on skype after I got back.

He lied saying it would only be 2 months. After two years of emotional, financial, and guilting me...I realized the truth.

I can go back now and see....even in the pictures....sweet talk and all that it was a calculated plan. It did not work. Thank God. I would be stuck with a liar the rest of my life if I had gone through with it.

After making a solid decision to get myself out of cognitive dissonance and see things in reality, I could make a good choice. It did take staying NO CONTACT.

So yes....I concluded with all the evidence that he was indeed "Romancing The Green Card"

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