Marrying a muslim

Submitted by Linzi (United Kingdom), Dec 12, 2006 at 07:22

If you did marry your boyfriend, get married and have kids, and then divorce, your husband would only get custody if you lived in an islamic country. Some Islamic countries are stricter than others. The father always has legal guardianship of a child, but the mother is the guardian until a boy is seven, and a girl is nine, possibly 11. Usually a muslim guy will not marry a non muslim, you would have to convert. You may think it would be a 'cheek' if he asked you while living in a christian counrty like the states. I have not experienced many muslim men returning to their homeland. Although it would depend on what country they are from, basically what their standard of living is like over there. Saudi is a beautiful country, my opinion, although I could be wrong is if he comes from a wealthy family he may choose to go back, Saudi is a safe country.

Speaking about my personal experience. I am married to an Algerian man. He used to drink, although not much. We initally mariied in an islamic ceremony. After which he changed, but I must admit, only slightly. He did not like it if I drank too much alcohol anymore. Also I didn't realize that he fasts at ramadan. It started when I brought a bottle of wine in the house to have with dinner at the holy month of ramadan. He said that I didn' jhave any respect, I asked 'who for', I didn't know what he was talking about.

Anyway he only occasionally prays, usually when there is a problem. At the beginnning i made fun of hm, I purposely put bottles of wines of wine on the table at dinner. I thought what a cheek he had coming to the UK and expecting an English girl to act like a muslim, although he has never actually asked me to convert, not in so many words. It took me a long time to accept the religion, just over six years to be precise.

Now I have decided to convert, for me, not him. I am not strict and I do not cover my head, but i have always dressed conservatively even before I met him. If you want to be with a muslim you have to act in a decent manner. You cannot go out and roll home drunk. You must recpect the religion and put your man first.

Muslim women are not treated as second class citizens, the woman has the job as the wife, mother, and keeping the home nice, which non muslim women should do anyway, but in the western world they sometimes don not.. Remember if you go to Saudi, abide by the customs, otherwise you will have a problem. The western world, sorry to say, but especially Amrerica is too open. I like Islamic culture as it is a decent way of living, its also a decent environment to raise children. Who wants their kids brought up amongst drink and drugs, although it is not always this way.

I must admit what angers me is in the past my husband has used visiting prostitutes, although a lot of men do, when someone claims to be quite religious, muslim, christian, whatever, I find it hypocritical.

If you can conform to the religion, and if you are happy, i say do not listen to anyone and go for it. I know many intelligent English women living in Islamic countries, and not wealthy ones like Saudi, and they are very happy. It is a nice way of life. You are not confined to the house, Muslim women do have careers. Most American people hate Muslims due to 9/11. Its only the minority that are terrorists.... Good luck

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