To K (turk boyfriend)

Submitted by Carmen (Mexico), Jan 26, 2007 at 17:12

Dear K:

I´m a mexican catholic girl and my boyfriend is also turkish. I just came back from Turkey, and i had a lovely time there. I agree with you, they are very nice and honest people.

I used to think when you truly love someone, religion is not an issue, but have you ever read the Holy Qur´ an, have you ever asked your boyfriend how will your life be, after you get married? Will he let you go to work without covering your hair? If you boyfriend is muslim but does not practise his religion, i understand it will be easier. But if he is a true muslim he will make you convert in order to marry with you, since children have to be raised by muslim women too.

I love my boyfriend, i was willing to give up my whole life to be with him. But when i came back to Mexico, he told me he is doubting about our relation, since he is afraid to be judged in the after death for marrying a non muslim woman. He says he can marry a non muslim woman, but he was hoping i´ll convert into the Islam sooner or later, so deep inside they might accept you as you are, but at the end they´ll pressure you to change and follow their rules.

I see nothing wrong on wanting to follow Islamic rules and their beliefs, i honestly respect the Islam (i´m even reading the Holy Qur´ an to inform myself), i found the Islam a beautiful religion and it deserves to be followed rightly. The problem here, is many muslim men, read and get the meaning of surah´s (verses) wrongly. Don´t get me wrong, turkish and muslim men are beautiful human beings, they try to do what they think Allah commands them, so i do not blame them.

I still want to reach him someday, but the day i decide to convert or not to the Islam, i want it to be by my own decision not to take it under pressure, taking decisions under pressure make people rush into things.

Yes is true we should not judge them all for someone´s bad or good experience. I´m glad your relationship goes well, i´m just talking about my experience for other women to see all kind of opinions.

Sincerely yours

Carmen calamarsin@hotmail.com

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