In response to Kathy.

Submitted by Anna (European Union), Feb 21, 2007 at 16:06

I would just like to say that I totally agree with Kathy's comments. I have been married to my Egyptian husband for 18 months. I met him in Luxor whilst i was on holiday over there. we then dated for 2 years before we got married, yes he did ask me to marry him after a few months of knowing him which most arab men do but i told him no, and that i would have to get to know him better before i did marry him. He was fine with this and was happy just to be dating. i also made sure it was a proper 'egyptian courtship' whereby we did not have sex before marriage etc (even though i was not a virgin). i thought, just because i am not muslim there is no way he is gong to think he can jump into bed with me because he certainly would not be able to do that with an egyptian woman .... this made him respect me even more, especially as a lot of men from the middle east think that us westerners are free and easy!!

I went to Luxor many times during our courtship and eventually, i moved to Luxor and we got married at the British Embassy. Before i did marry him however i laid the law down, which i have continued to do throughout our marriage, some of these laws have been as follows: I am not muslim, i am christian, i will not covert for anyone, i will not wear muslim dress (i wear shorts in the summer with strappy tops etc), I will not be at his beck and call 24/7, house hold chores are spilt, i am an educated woman, therefore i work. i certainly wouldn't stay at home cleaning all day.

i have told him that when we do have children i will decide on their names, as i certainly do not think it is fair for a little girls to have his name, his fathers name and grandfathers name! These are just a few things that i demanded before i got married, my husband agreed to this and has never gone back on his word, the only thing i have agreed to is that our children can be muslim. I have also made it quite clear to him that if he ever laid a finger on me then i would be out of the door and would never look back. All of these factors that i outlined to him before marriage was also agreed by his family, they seem to respect me more because i am my own person.

As Kathy said, you are american women, stand up for yourselves. i am an english woman and certainly would not take crap off any man, english, egyptian, whatever! I am my own person which all of you should also be!!

My husband has also stated that he has no desire to live in England, yes he has gone here for a holiday, but a week was long enough for him.

All i can say is, stand up for yourselves girls!! What you need to remember is one of the main reasons why these men are attracted to us in the first place is because we stand up for ourselves, we have a voice, we are free, we are not repressed. why change one of the things they are attracted to when you marry them?

Not meaning to sound rude, you women who marry these men after a few months of meeting them, especially those who met the men online need a reality check, it seems to me like you are asking for trouble.

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