Some men and women are good; some men and women are bad. All over the world.

Submitted by Fareedah (United States), Feb 22, 2007 at 16:54

If you don't know the truth about a situation, don't make stories up. Do not lie about others. I am Muslim mother and wife. I attended college many years ago, got my own apartment, maried, divorced a unkind husband and then remarried to a very good husband. When my daughters were in school, they were a part of the girl scouts, had bowling parties, ice skating and roller skating parties, went to movies and were very involved in school activities, both in their private Muslim school and then in high school. Sometimes they liked my rules, sometimes they did not. Sometimes they felt my husband and I were more liberal than their friends, sometimes they felt we were too strict. Like almost every other high school kids. Sometimes we disagreed, argued, slammed doors and then said our prayers and quieted down. Sometimes they understood. Sometimes I changed my mind. Sometimes we compromised.

As a Muslim wife and mother, I cook whatever I want for dinner. Or my husband on occasion may cook. Or maybe my son. Sometimes it takes minutes, sometimes longer, sometimes we order out. I am the "Lady of the House" and manage, decorate, and decide on almost all aspects of my household in terms of meals, repairs, maintenance, improvements, social activities, etc. But I am not the maid, a helper or an subject in my own home.

My husband is responsible for all of my bills, expenses, maintenance even though I work outside the home. However, we work together on big things and small things. We respect and care for one another as we are "twin halves of each other" and "garments for one another" to quote the Prophet and the Quran. None of us are perfect and we make mistakes all the time. But we know we all have an obligation to be considerate and kind to one another, our friends and neighbors, the animals and the earth.

There are "players", sneaky men and women, and immoral people everywhere. Look at Hollywood, the NBA, the politcos in Washington, even the religious organizations. There are wonderful, good people everywhere also, at work, on the train or bus and at parties, malls and the same places where the bad people are. Whoever thinks that all Muslims are bad is just as wrong as Muslims who think the "West" is an immoral land with one blanket view of all. Whoever curses and blasphemes Islam, the Holy Quran, and its true followers is just as wrong as those Muslims they criticize and perhaps should consider that is why so-called Muslims say mean things about the "West" and non-Muslims. It is because they are ignorant.

If a man or woman is in a bad relationship, that person has a duty to themself to get out of it. To complain about being mistreated for years and years indicates there is something seriously wrong and that person should stop playing the victim and take responsibility for the quality of their life. Move on. There is nothing in Islamic law that prevents this.

Just as American society is hypocritical about race, money, and class so are so-called Islamic societies. Do not confuse culture with the religion of Islam. Just as foreigners should not think that everyone lives in a big beautiful home like TV and solve problems in 30 minutes like a sitcom. Do not confuse media for reality. Do not be ignorant. Do not believe everything you read. Do your own research with valid references. Remember the search for weapons of mass destruction that were never found?

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