For Maryann/I am an American living in Turkey with boyfriend

Submitted by melungeongirl (Turkey), Mar 19, 2007 at 12:21

Hi Marryann, I'm not sure how much help I will be to you. But I will tell you my experience. I started reading the comments on here a couple of months ago hoping for encouragement. What I found was alot of pity stories and pure ignorance.I wouldn't give any man money I dont care where he is from.Yes I have both male and female friends who have married for papers.This is not to scare you just to make you pay attention and think smart not just with your heart. Now I am American and I live in Turkey with my boyfriend. Not everyone here covers their hair.I am in the western part of Turkey.This is not an Arabic country.Turkish people are majority sunni muslims but they are not Arabs.This is a big difference that I dont think a lot of Americans understand.

Now just as in America we have very religious christians and we have those who would say there christians but dont practice.It's the same here in Turkey the younger generation seem to me more open. Turkish people are very proud of their country and heritage.Things that I have observed so far children are loved dearly here. And families are very close which I love. It is normal to see siblings or friends hugging walking down the street or holding hands. I have read that muslim societies dont show affection in public. I am not sure where that came from but in my experience it's not true my boyfriend and I kiss hold hands, hug in public as well as other couples I've seen.

My boyfriend is a lawyer ,he has several homes lives a very comfortable life, loves Turkey and does not want to live in the US. He is generous,affectionate ,loving,and understanding. He does not tell me how to dress though I would not dress to show body parts anyway. I am christian. his family knows. Muslim men are aloud to marry christians the women are not. But even that happens. You most likely will not be able to marry without his parents permission. Although I also know on the rare occassion this has been done also.

I'm not going to say all Turkish men are like mine because everyone has ther own identity.But I will say I am very happy and feel as though I am the luckiest woman ever.The only thing that might be of concern to you if like me you dont speak Turkish. I am learning but it is really hard for me. He speaks english fluently but as far as I've seen this is rare. If I were you I would start learning now before you come here. And read about Turkey. If you have any further questions I would be happy to answer.

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